At our church (CPC) we’ve been in a great season of exploring how Jesus stepped outside the lines of his culture in order to love others well. It has been a rich and challenging study, so I thought I’d share some quotes, questions, and resources that have been stretching and helpful.
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Bagpipes echo “Amazing Grace” as Billy Graham’s casket is taken from his memorial service under a tent in his birthplace of Charlotte, North Carolina Friday. I was only able to catch the second half of the service on TV, but it brought me to tears with awe and gratitude that we have the privilege of telling people about Jesus.
Billy wasn’t infallible, but he got a lot right. And the big thing I see is that he simply shared the truth from God’s Word. Period. He marinated in it. It was naturally a part of his vocabulary.
Monday I confessed that I don’t give Satan enough thought. I wrote about my need (maybe yours too?) for a corrected, healthy awareness of Satan and his agenda. Satan’s agenda is to separate us from God. His M.O.? Lies.
He (Satan) was a murderer from the beginning, and does not stand in the truth because there is no truth in him. Whenever he speaks a lie, he speaks from his own nature, for he is a liar and the father of lies. John 8:44 NASB
When Jesus goes into the wilderness, Satan uses three lies to tempt Him (Matthew 4). Satan basically tempted Jesus (and tempts each of us) to buy into false identities. A few that he uses are:
Confession: There are a couple of things I don’t give a lot of thought to.
SATAN is one of them.
I admit, I don’t expect Satan to really care about messing with little ol’ me, but C.S. Lewis points out that this is a mistake.
I’m all about gathering people. It’s my passion whether it’s around a charcoal fire in Uganda, or for coffee at Starbucks, or a backyard BBQ. I’m in a season when sometimes I can partner with others to add some special touches, but hospitality is about blessing, not impressing.
You may be in a season when hospitality is ordering pizza and inviting people into your mess is a powerful ministry! Go for it!
I had an older, mentor-type friend years ago when we lived in Washington D.C. One weekend we invited she and her husband over for dinner. At the time I had a newborn and 20 month old and I seriously think I served them Hamburger Helper. It was a good thing I didn’t know she was a gourmet cook!
She set a formal table that was lovely, serving dinner in several courses. Her meals were a work of art. When this couple reciprocated and we went to their house for dinner, our first course – peanut soup – had a decorative swirl of sour cream on top. For dessert she served us individual white chocolate mousse in the shape of a heart in a pool of raspberry. She and her husband were gracious hosts and we enjoyed wonderful conversation in their home. But she couldn’t understand why no one invited HER over for dinner. Her closest friend had to gently tell her that once someone had come to her house they were intimidated. No one could host a dinner party with the same excellence or formality.
Another mentor, Sibyl Towner once said, “Hospitality is when someone leaves your home feeling better about themselves, not better about you.”
Whatever I do, my goal is to communicate “You’re special. I want you to feel loved and cared for.” but that doesn’t mean it needs to be “Martha Stewart meticulous”.
It’s almost March first and as I look out the window where I’m writing the world is still white and gray.
In Minnesota, March is the cruelest month… The month I’m most tempted to throw in the towel and run away to Tahiti. It’s hard to stay motivated on every front, especially the One Word front. But we’re in this together, amiright?
In February I promised a prompt each month to help us really lean into our One Word with Jesus. So today, just two questions to journal about.
Imagine going to your mailbox on a bright, chilly, winter day and as you pull out the impersonal ads and the dreaded bills, among the mess, you find (gasp!) a real, live, hand-addressed note! As rare as a unicorn! To YOU!
One of my favorite verses is Zechariah 4:10 that tells us not to despise the day of small things. A note is a “small thing” that can have a huge impact.
What if whenever you notice anything positive you were to write a note of affirmation to the person who comes to mind? Many times when I’ve done this, the recipient of a note has remarked on the perfect timing of its arrival. That’s God at work through a “small thing”.
John and I both have a drawer where we save special notes that have been meaningful and encouraging to us. As I think about them, there are several characteristics they have in common.
I’ve been thinking about caves. Weird, I know, right? But recently I had the privilege of climbing to (on rock steps – we’re not talking ropes and crampons here) and exploring, a series of huge caves on an island in Vietnam. It got me reflecting on caves in the Bible and why people went there. Caves were places of refuge, but usually a last resort, and often dark and lonely.
Here are a few that came to mind. Can you relate to any of these “cave moments”?
- When you’re distressed and afraid.
When Saul is chasing David and he is running for his life he hides in a cave with others who are disillusioned.
1 Samuel 22: 1-3
David left Gath and escaped to the cave of Adullam. When his brothers and his father’s household heard about it, they went down to him there. All those who were in distress or in debt or discontented gathered around him, and he became their commander.
Maybe it feels like circumstances are just too much for you and you’re afraid, or angry or discouraged. You may need to hide in God…curl up in the safety of His presence.
2. When you’re exhausted.
After God uses Elijah to miraculously defeat the prophets of Baal, Jezebel is still after him and he runs away, exhausted.
1 Kings 19:3-9
Elijah was afraid and ran for his life. When he came to Beersheba in Judah, he left his servant there, while he himself went a day’s journey into the wilderness. He came to a broom bush, sat down under it and prayed that he might die. “I have had enough, Lord,” he said. “Take my life; I am no better than my ancestors.”Then he lay down under the bush and fell asleep.
All at once an angel touched him and said, “Get up and eat.” He looked around, and there by his head was some bread baked over hot coals, and a jar of water. He ate and drank and then lay down again.
The angel of the Lord came back a second time and touched him and said, “Get up and eat, for the journey is too much for you.” So he got up and ate and drank. Strengthened by that food, he traveled forty days and forty nights until he reached Horeb, the mountain of God. There he went into a cave and spent the night.
Note that the first thing God does is meet Elijah’s physical needs. Have you ever noticed how fatigue affects your perspective? John Ortberg writes, “Sometimes the most spiritual thing we can do is take a nap.” Maybe you need both physical rest and the spiritual rest from striving that God can provide.
3. When you need to grieve a death.
Jesus allows Lazarus to die in order that He can show His power to bring life out of death.
John 11:38-39
Jesus, once more deeply moved, came to the tomb. It was a cave with a stone laid across the entrance. “Take away the stone,” he said.
Maybe you’ve experienced the death of a dream and you need God to show you where He is going to bring new life. Maybe you’re waiting for Him to roll away a stone that has been a stumbling block for you. Maybe you need time in your cave to pour out your heart in grief.
After all, it was in a burial cave that Jesus overcame death and made a way for us to live forever with Him, right?
In caves we may have silence and solitude pressed upon us, but it’s a time to cling to Jesus. Maybe we can draw encouragement from what David wrote when he was in a cave. Psalm 142:1-3
I cry aloud to the Lord;
I lift up my voice to the Lord for mercy.
I pour out before him my complaint;
before him I tell my trouble.
When my spirit grows faint within me,
it is you who watch over my way.
We all want to feel significant. Am I right?? We want to be -ER or -EST.
But when the only way we get our validation is through “yard-sticking” (being better or best), rather through God’s unconditional delight in us we’re sunk.
I compare, and I think “Ahhhh! I’m better than that!” and pride sneaks in. Or I compare and I think, “Oh, I’ll never be as good as ______” and I forget my worth in Jesus. Pride or Insecurity are the dangers of focusing on -er and -est.
This is an on-going struggle, kind of like whack-a-mole, needing constant attention because the yardstick will pop up over and over.
The other day I wrote about the first 3 practices that I’ve tried in combatting the tendency to yardstick. Here are the final 2. What would you add?
4. Practice gratitude.
Everything God created is good, and to be received with thanks. 1Timothy 4:4 MSG
Stop and make a list of the gifts, talents, and opportunities God has given you, thanking Him for the “good works He planned for you long ago”. Even things that seem like limitations may be used for God’s glory. Think of Peter and Paul in jail and their witness.
5. Embrace the discipline of genuine affirmation that comes from a place of abundance not scarcity.
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. Ephesians 4:29
Sometimes, especially when someone else is getting a boatload of attention, it’s hard to be affirming. We can choke on our words because we think “It’s not FAIR!” But when we can be authentic and specific I believe it will strengthen our confidence in God as a God of abundance and not scarcity.
One caveat…I do believe that there are times when we’re called to protect our soul from people who somehow Satan seems to consistently use to reinforce the lie of “not good enough”. This doesn’t mean they are bad people at all, but I unfollow and unsubscribe those who bring out shame or anxiety in me. Boundaries can be a blessing.
None of this is easy. What thoughts would you add?
99% of the time I love being a cheerleader! It’s easy for me to get excited about the contributions others are making to the kingdom.
I marvel at those who have gifts that I don’t.
Like anything having to do with math. Or spreadsheets. Or budgets. A poker face. Technology. Patience. The ability to not speak every word that comes to mind.
But then there are other moments.
Especially with folks who have similar gifts and talents to mine, I find myself doing what psychologists call “yard-sticking” – the act of comparing yourself to others, particularly people in your own peer group, in a manner that results in feelings of inadequacy or jealousy.
And let me just say, I know you. I’m not alone. There are certain people who, when you hear someone rave about them, or see them on social media being all shiny and successful with “perfect kids” or a “perfect job”, it triggers something sad and hurtful inside you. You feel diminished. Discounted. And that is not from Jesus.
Clearly, this is not something I’ve mastered, but there are 5 practices that have been helpful to me. I’ll share the first 3 today:
I roll over at zero dark thirty this morning in a hotel room in Hanoi to see a missed call on my cell phone. In my heart I know why. It was a call from the husband of my best friend from college. Patty was diagnosed with ALS (that horrific disease that gradually takes away your ability to speak, eat, move and breathe) 3 years ago. Last night she was healed and greeted in heaven where I’m sure she is having a blast. She always was a party waiting to happen.
Patty was fun and funny and compassionate and wise, and had all-together the best laugh ever. God took her on an amazing life-journey where He used her to come alongside people in pain or resource counselors helping others in pain around the world wo were experiencing trauma. This picture was taken when our paths crossed in London. Patty had just come from Nigeria and was on her way to Turkey and then Azerbaijan. Crazy, eh? In a post 4 years ago, after this picture, I asked her 5 questions about helping people in pain. I’m posting it again today in her honor. 
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Hi, I’m Laura – a Jesus-follower who gets it wrong a lot, but is still beloved just like you.
