What Hospitality Looks Like

Last week, we drove down a shady street of starter homes built in the 50’s and pulled up to our friends’, a few minutes after 6:00 on a perfect Minnesota summer evening.

Dad and sons 5, and 7 years old, were playing catch with their new gator/Covid masks on as they waited for us to arrive.

In their front yard a giant oak tree stretched a green leafy canopy over 4 “big people” chairs and 2 kid-sized chairs socially distanced in a circle. These, with our friends and a table of drinks welcomed us.

We smiled wide, exclaiming greetings, so happy to see each other, but resisting the urge to hug.

We talked about books and church and politics and family and transitions with the easy grace of people who have known each other for some seasons. The boys darted around, alighting once in awhile to join in the conversation like puppies, curious for a time and then gone once more to follow a bright new distraction.

Last night we drove out to a friend’s house on a lake for dinner. She greeted us with hair still damp from the shower – her very presence saying “Come as you are!” We sat on her deck that felt like a treehouse above the lake, and caught up over wine til raindrops chased us inside.

We rummaged in her drawers and set the table as she extinguished a fire on the grill and brought in charred flatbread with tomato, mozzarella and pesto that we gobbled up with laughter, and questions about life and self-understanding, conflict and reconciliation.

These two recent experiences were reminders to me of what true hospitality looks like.

1. It risks inviting. We do a lot in our home so it is less common for us to be the invited ones. How delightful it feels to be asked over!
2. It says, “You are so welcome here! Make yourself at home. This is us and you belong.” Real makes people relax.
3. It focuses on what’s important – being present to people, not stressed with performance. People remember how you made them feel, not how fancy you were.
4. It asks good questions, tells good stories, and fills us up with reminders of the goodness of God and His people.

We are not made for isolation. Yes, gathering looks different in this cautious season of Covid, but we still get to reflect the welcoming heart of God.

What has your experience of hospitality been recently?