Tag: truth (Page 2 of 3)

Two Truths and a Lie

January 11, 2017 /

1. My husband went to prom with a murderer.

2. I bungee jumped at Victoria Falls, Zambia

3. I received flying lessons as a wedding gift.

Two of these statements are true and one is not.* Ever play that game?

I think we play an unhealthy version of it in our heads every day.  Often we just rehearse a lie over and over again as IF it were the truth.

What should we do instead of listening to the tape in our head that says “Not good enough. Not valuable. Uninvited. Unforgivable.”?

Paul gives us some advice in 2 Corinthians.

 The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. 5 We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. 2 Corinthians 10:4-5

Here, “Stronghold”  is like a castle with a mote, but I picture it kind of like a hologram that you can walk through – it isn’t real. The Greek word for stronghold, ochuróma can mean: “a prisoner locked by deception”.  Satan is the father of lies and he may make his castle seem impregnable, but it’s not!

In another place I found this definition:  “A stronghold is an influence by the enemy … The strength of the stronghold depends on how long and how much influence a person has allowed over themselves by listening to what the enemy is saying concerning any given situation in which the stronghold has taken root.”

We see the truth of this emphasized in Proverbs:

Carefully guard your thoughts because they are the source of true life. Prov. 4:23 CEV

Craig Groeschel says:**

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So what can we do? Replace lies with Truth and then, practice rehearsing the Truth more than the lies. 

As you speak Truth to yourself, you’ll grow in the strength of God and His thoughts about you – yay!

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What if we rehearse the truth instead of the lie? What the mind repeats it retains, right?

Think of a negative phrase you have said aloud or thought to yourself that stems from a sense of shame rather than your identity in Christ as HIs beloved child.

Turn it upside down and say, in first person, present tense, an affirmation of your God-given value. For example:

I am unlovable. . . . I am infinitely loved.
I don’t have enough. . . . I have everything I need.
I am stupid. . . . I have the mind of Christ.
I am worthless. . . . I am precious in God’s eyes, I am honored, and God loves me.

So mine would be:

I am not good enough. I don’t add value…   I am uniquely gifted by God & He has prepared good works in advance for me.

So say the positive truth aloud like it is true several time. Then rest silently in the awareness that this is you – a unique, gifted, equipped child of God, made in His image.

* Write the most common lie Satan uses to trip you up in the comments and I’ll tell you which one is the lie. 🙂

**This is adapted from Life Church. For more on this, watch “Words to Live By” by Craig Groeschel, or read this synopsis.

How to Respond When “Not Good Enough” is Ringing in Your Ears

September 19, 2016 /

I have to be honest with you. I was feeling quite Anne Shirley-ish the beginning of August – “in the depths of despair” as she liked to say dramatically. There was no up to my emotional roller coaster ride, only down. I experienced some cold hard failure and  the crafty Lying Liar was having a hey day with me.

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This isn’t his first carnival. He knows exactly which attractions will trigger all the fear and insecurity in me. He knows how to get me into the “fun house” of distortions, and turn up the volume of the hawkers on the Midway who all seem to shout “Not good enough! Not good enough!”

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And before you know it, I’m owning it. It’s MY refrain that echoes through my days. “Not good enough.”

“NOT good enough!”

“Not GOOD enough!”

“Not good ENOUGH!”

I did all the things I know to do when discouraged.

I tried to focus on serving others instead of myself.

I tried rehearsing everything I’m thankful for.

I prayed.

And then, a little nudge on my shoulder drew me away from the noise of the Midway to a tiny whisper of the Holy Spirit.

At first there was a question.

Could it be that by saying “Not good enough” about yourself, you are actually saying that about God? That God isn’t “good enough”? Did He make a mistake? Are His ways perfect except when it comes to you?

And then this came to mind:

“For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.” Ephesians 2:10

If God has prepared good works in advance for me to do, He has created me “good enough” to accomplish them.

Yes I’m a cracked pot, broken and imperfect and in need of redemption.

I may not be a 10 talent person, but the 3 talents God has given me or you are good, and the works He has for us to do are good. And He is good.

There are times we may fail and it’s God’s will for us to learn from it, pick ourselves up, and try again. But I think there are other times when, instead of beating ourselves up, we need to say, “Well, that must not be the good work God has for me. He must have something else up His sleeve.”

The Message paraphrases it this way: “He creates each of us by Christ Jesus to join him in the work he does, the good work he has gotten ready for us to do, work we had better be doing.”

You ARE good enough because God in you is more than good enough.

So let’s find the work He’s prepared for us to do and do it!

“If you know you are the Beloved, you can live  with an enormous amount of success and an enormous amount of failure without losing your identity. Because your identity is that you are the Beloved…The question becomes ‘Can I live a life of faith in the world and trust that it will bear fruit?'” – Henri Nouwen

 

What to do With Critics You’d Really Like to Take Out

April 5, 2016 /

When someone criticizes me or my husband John I think, “Oh, how thoughtful. They clearly love us. They have examined the plank in their own eye and are now graciously pointing out the itsy bitsy teeny tiny spec in ours. That is sooooooo lovely!”

Kind of like surreptitiously motioning to a friend that they have a smudge of ketchup in the corner of their mouth while they’re eating  – you know…in a way that doesn’t embarrass them.

Or maybe not. Maybe I stew and think how very unfair life is, and that thing they said I said isn’t what I meant at all, and Come ON already!

Maybe I conduct imaginary conversations in my head where I have witty putdowns and “Ha HA! Take THAT’s!”

Maybe I pray that all the critics would be exiled to Bolivia and that Donald Trump would build a wall so that they can’t get back in. Continue reading

How Can We “Live in the Tension” with Love?

February 28, 2016 /

Tomorrow I leave on another trip to Israel/Palestine with Telos, an organization that is pro-Israel, pro-Palestine, pro-peace.

The picture for me is completed when I add “Pro-Jesus”.

In case you were wondering, this is not an easy gig.

Loving people we don’t agree with is safe when it’s just a theory. Bob Goff

Some of you may already be angry with me, but one of the values of our church is a commitment to “live in the tension”. This doesn’t just apply to politics, but so many other social issues also.

Sometimes there are problems that can be solved, but often there are tensions must be managed.

Most of us love black and white, right and wrong, winners and losers, who’s in and who’s out.

We love boundary markers.

We want to major on love but not at the expense of truth, and that can be tricky.

Living in the tension is a hard one that can be misunderstood, but what it means is: Continue reading

4 Benefits to Reading (most of) the Bible in a Year

November 9, 2015 /

Confession: I am afraid this post is going to come off like one of those neat and tidy, happy clappy “Life is so good with Jesus” posts that are true as far as they go, but can make everyone feel queasy and a little “less than”.

That is NOT what I want. But I also can’t deny the powerful effect committing to a “Read through the Bible in a Year Plan” has had on me. Yeah, I’ve always read the Bible before, but this has been different. And yes, I’ve missed a bunch of days, but that’s ok.

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So…Here are few things I’ve experienced reading the whole most of a lot of the Bible in a Year Continue reading

5 Things to Consider When Telling Someone About Their Blind Spots

September 9, 2015 /

Monday I posted about blind spots, feedback, and the cones in our tree we may be missing.

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It’s really hard to be a good receiver of feedback, but I think we also need to be good givers of feedback.

  • When we give feedback we’re essentially saying that someone else is worth investing in.  They have potential. I care enough about you to tell you about this cone in your tree.
  • When we give feedback we envision a better future for the person.  We give them the tools to grow. Here’s how you might get rid of that cone.
  • When we give feedback we give people perspective. We help them zoom out to see this was just one game, or one talk, or one project that’s part of the bigger picture of who they are becoming. That cone doesn’t have to hold you back forever.

How do we do that well, though? I’m no expert, but I was thinking of this in the context of some young women I mentor. It’s more an art than a science, but it seems there are several things to be aware of. Continue reading

Is There a Safety Cone in Your Tree?

September 7, 2015 /

The other day a friend and I were walking around Lake Harriet and all of a sudden I stopped. Something weird caught my eye. Something was not quite right.

I looked up, and this is what I saw.FullSizeRender-32

So many questions!

Who? Why? How come?

And did anyone else notice, or just walk by, oblivious?

It made me think of a talk at the Global Leadership Summit and wonder how many cones are in my tree that I’m unaware of. Continue reading

Is the Story You’re Telling Yourself True?

September 2, 2015 /

Confession: I haven’t been a raving Brené Brown fan. I like Brené Brown’s material on vulnerability, but I don’t love it. It hasn’t been revolutionary for me, probably because I’m too open as it is. I don’t need any encouragement in that area.

However, last month at the Global Leadership Summit, she spoke and I wished so much that John had been sitting next to me so I could elbow him about every other word she said. (Never mind that he would have been elbowing me too.) The material, from her new book Rising Strong, was painfully relevant.

According to her, “Our brain is wired to make up a story to explain every difficult human interaction—whether it’s true or not. That story helps us interpret the discomfort by protecting our ego and self-image.” Continue reading

5 Reminders For Your Heart

May 18, 2015 /

We’ve been in San Francisco over the weekend for Maggie’s graduation with her Masters from Berkley.  This is that time of year – one of graduations and weddings and new ventures and births of every kind. It’s a season of marking moments. Looking back and looking forward. As I was reflecting on this I thought it’s a time when maybe our heart needs reminding of some things.

So, today, a list of 5 Reminders your heart needs as you launch into whatever new things God has for you: Continue reading

When You Feel Unvaluable

January 14, 2015 /

My top three strengths are “activator” and “achiever” and “woo”. That means I really, really, really want to do ALL OF THE THINGS, to be awesome, and to have you like me.

So it stung, hearing the words. Out loud.  Again. A phrase similar to others I’ve heard over the years.

My husband John was recounting his day and a meeting he had had with a member of the church who had listened and given insight on the future of our faith community. John and his colleague in the meeting asked this awesomely awesome guest to return for another hour of conversation.

“Of course this will be pay-rolled!  We value your gifts and talents and expertise, so ABSOLUTELY we’ll pay you for your time!”

“Said no one to me ever”, is the place my slightly over-dramatic mind went to as I listened to him.

Validation. Whether you’re twenty-something, or….well, not… we all long for it and even when we get it in one form, we want more, or different.  We’re desperate to know we matter.  We add value.  We make a difference. Continue reading

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