I was treading water in Lake Geneva on a hot summer afternoon, wondering if I might die. My 8 year old eyes were focused 12 feet above me on the 4 foot square wooden platform attached to a pier with a vertical ladder – like the tiny platform the circus clown jumps off and into a bucket of water. My cousin climbed the rickety steps while other siblings and cousins waited in line behind him.
Here was the game we were playing: Kid #1 jumps off the “high dive” (read rotted wooden death trap) and treads water below while Kids 2, 3, 4…, one at a time, try to jump as close as possible without crushing the ones in the water until everyone is in the water, hopefully all still breathing. Fun times!
Yep, kind of like human bocce ball but with higher stakes.
What can I say? We were creative and adventurous.
I look back on the things my parents let me do (including traveling in Europe alone) and I am astounded that I’m here to tell about it.
As a parent myself of kids who have now survived to adulthood, I’m amazed they made it relatively unscathed too. There are many times I look back and say to myself, “What were we thinking??!!!”
The world is vastly different from when I was a kid, or when my kids were young. None of us had active shooter drills at school. So what are the crucial choices we make to foster independence while keeping our kids, grandkids, or students safe in a dangerous world?
As my friend, Sally says “I’ve basically got my kids for 18 years. I need to make the most of the time and steward it well.”
Although I applied it very imperfectly, the best thing I learned when my kids were little is this:
We have three jobs: protect our kids, prepare them, and pray for them.
What the first two look like at different ages will vary.
1. When they are little we major on protecting them.
We put child locks on cupboards and strap them in car seats.
We also ask ourselves questions like:
- What controls should we put on different tech devices?
- When should we let our kids have a phone?
- Are sleepovers with friends ok?
2. As they grow, there is less we can do to protect them, and we major on preparing them for the dangers they are increasingly navigating alone.
We have conversations at the dinner table, anticipating different situations they may have to navigate.
We tell the truth about the dangers they may face, but we remind them that the Creator of the universe is with them, equipping them for any situation.
And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.
2 Cor. 9:8
“The Spirit in you is far stronger than anything in the world.”
1 john 4:4
3. No matter what age they are, we cover our kids in prayer.
Lord, I can’t be with my kids every moment, but You can.
I can’t know everything, or see everything, but You do.
I place them in Your hands.
Father, help them to be brave, and wise and kind.
Protect them in body, mind, and spirit.
May they see unmistakable evidence of your love and faithfulness today.
What are some of the situations your kids may face right now at the age they are? I’d really like to hear from you in the comments!
