Every year I try to do a little better at prepping for the Christmas season so that on January 1st I’m sighing in contentment instead of exhaustion and regret. Can you relate?
A squirrel has already decimated a box of Christmas cookies I left in my “outdoor fridge” so I may not be the most credible guide, but we’re in this together, so let me offer a little help and you can reciprocate by sharing your ideas in the comments!
Which one describes your state of mind? Check one:
DENIAL. You’re in denial. You don’t want to be reminded, but the holidays are slowly tiptoeing towards us. There’s a feeling of panic when you look at the calendar. You’ll probably end up blitzing at the last possible second.
DEPRESSED. You love Advent, but the circumstances of your life mean you may have to adjust your expectations this year and that’s depressing.
DELIGHTED. You have been scrolling Christmas Pinterest ideas since August and you’re SO EXCITED, but not everyone is onboard with your vision for the holidays!
DEFAULT. You are the default or designated host for ALLOFTHETHINGS, either because you have the most room, or because of your location or whatever, but you struggle not to feel resentful and like you can’t enjoy the holidays because you’re doing all the work.
DISCOURAGED. The holidays are great, and you’d like to create some great memories, but you just feel inadequate to host anything. You get sucked into comparing yourself with others on social media and feeling “less than”.
Regardless of how you’re feeling, we can all use some help at the holidays! No one accidentally drifted into a meaningful Advent. It takes some forethought.
So today and for the next couple of days, I’ll give you some suggestions. Before we can give to others, we need to tend to our own soul.
Day One
Provide for your Soul
Be still and know that I am God.
Psalm 46:10
Note to self: It doesn’t say “be busy”, or “be productive” or “be perfect”.
Put away your phone and any other potential distractions.
Take some time today before things get crazy to pray for Advent. Talk to God about what is on your heart.
What are you concerned or anxious about?
In what relationships will you need extra grace and patience?
Are there special services at church you want to be sure to attend?
Sit and breathe in God’s sufficiency for all that is ahead of you.
Don’t panic. I’m with you. There’s no need to fear for I’m your God. I’ll give you strength. I’ll help you. I’ll hold you steady, keep a firm grip on you.
Isaiah 41:10
You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you.
Isaiah 26:3
God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.”
Hebrews 13:5
But now, this is what the Lord says— he who created you, Jacob, he who formed you, Israel: “Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you..
Isaiah 43:1
For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.
I really wish I liked Yoga more. It’s healthy. And it’s so in. But I’m not crazy about it.
Here are the only things I like about Yoga:
the comfy pants that are like legal pajamas,
the fact that you do it in a group, and not, for example on a stationary bike in your basement (like a crazy introvert),
the corpse pose (where you lay still with soft music playing and the instructor sometimes massages your shoulders).
And one more thing…
They remind you tobreathe. In fact, I think that’s the only part I consistently get right when I go. I mess up all the poses. And I can’t make myself pretzelize (is that a word?) like my friend Brooke.
But then they say, “Don’t forget to breathe.” and I think “Yes! I’ve got that down! Score!” (Can you tell I’m better at competitive sports than contemplative ones?)
Sometimes the best I can do at Yoga is to just keep breathing. Sometimes the best I can do in the Christmas season is just keep breathing too.
Our to-to lists are too long. We drop balls and forget to follow through with details. And our regular spiritual practices and rhythm of time with Jesus may suffer. But no matter what happens in the next few weeks, most (hopefully all) of us will still be breathing when we get to the New Year. So what if breathing became a spiritual practice?
It’s one many of you are probably familiar with: breath prayer.
Think for a minute…What is a name for God that is especially meaningful to you this season? Abba Father, Gentle Shepherd, Wonderful Counselor, Prince of Peace, Emmanuel, Light of the World, King of Kings…
As you breathe in, silently say this name for God.
Then… What sums up your need or desire of your heart this season?
Peace? Healing? Guidance?
Construct a short phrase that expresses this. As you breathe out, pray this phrase.
For a long time, I’ve felt out of control in many areas of my life, so my breath prayer has been, “Abba Father” (as I breathe in). “Do what only You can do.” (as I breathe out).
Or maybe you might pray something like Mary did “Holy One, be magnified in my life.” (Luke 2:46-55).
Or, “Prince of Peace, calm my anxious heart.”
In heavy traffic. Breathe. In crowded stores. Breathe. In tense family situations. Breathe. Sitting in front of your Christmas tree. Breathe. On a walk alone. Breathe.
I sit in front of a cheery fire, late at night, looking at our glowing Christmas tree. It’s still delightful, even with gifts gone from underneath. We’ve had a lovely holiday season in spite of Covid and allofthethings.
We lit candles. We sang carols. We marveled at Christmas lights and lifted our gaze to wonder at stars in the night sky.
Jesus was born in us again. Glory to God in the highest heavens. And glory to God in the lowest stable.
Still, there are things I wish I had done differently.
In the Christmas season, everything is MORE.
We feel everything MORE intensely – the good and the bad. We add in MORE to our already-packed-no-margin schedules. We drink MORE and eat MORE and bake MORE.
And all that MORE comes at a price.
If you’re like me, Advent can creep up on you and all of a sudden you’re in the middle of it, scrambling to fit in everything.
SO here are three things I’m doing to make next year even better:
1. MAKE A LIST NOW!
Right now, make a google doc or a paper list if that’s your jam (make sure to put it in a safe place).
Consider having a conversation with your family if you want to include them. Evaluate Christmas 2021. Discuss these questions:
What worked well for Christmas 2021?
What mistakes do we want to avoid for Christmas 2022?
List ideas you read about this year that you’d like to do next year.
Consider getting a plastic bin and labeling it Christmas 2022. In it you can put things like books, gifts, Christmas lights, or cards that you buy on sale in January.
HOSPITALITY
What did you bake that you liked?
What menus worked?
Did you entertain too much or do you wish you had done more?
What helped make entertaining less stressful?
Are there specific types of gatherings you’d like to create?
SOUL CARE
What spiritual practices, devotionals, or books did you read that were meaningful? Are there ones you’ve seen others use that you’d like to try next year?
The best things I did this year were to participate in a half day Advent retreat early in December (you can also purchase portable retreats here), and use the Quiet Christmas Collection by Emily P. Freeman.
DECORATING
Take pictures before you take down decorations if you want to duplicate next year. Save links to that mantel you saw on Instagram that you’d like to try. Make note of what needs to be replaced (like Christmas lights).
CREATING
IF you love creating, make a list linking to ideas of things you’d like to make next year. Things you’ve seen for hostess gifts, family traditions, decorating, or party themes.
Are there traditions you’d like to start? I read about this idea from prvrbsthirtyonegirl that I LOVE and even though I don’t have kids at home, I might create one for John and me! Ally and Ryan have one family activity for each day of Advent. You can make your own list that fits with your life stage!
Every year I used to read The Best Christmas Pageant Ever aloud to the family, a chapter a night. This year my book group read Truman Capote’s A Christmas Memory which would be another good read-aloud for a little bit older kids.
A wonderful novel for the season is Winter Solstice by Rosamunde Pilcher
GIFTS
What are gifts you received that might be a good idea to remember? (Two of our favorites were Lou Malnati’s pizza from Chicago and homemade Lars Bars (which my friend renamed “Laura Bars” 😍 for hiking, along with the recipes! )
Did you hear about a game that another family tried and liked that would be good to get next year? (We got and loved “It’s in the Bag”!)
2. SCHEDULE A DAY LATER
Block off a day on your calendar and label it CHRISTMAS PLANNING DAY.
You can make it whenever you want, but I’d say a day in the week before Thanksgiving would be good. I’ve marked my calendar for Saturday, November 19th. I also try to protect the Sunday, and Monday after Thanksgiving to decorate.
Then put two alerts in – one for a week before and one for two days before so it will actually happen! (I almost forgot this, and believe me, it won’t happen if I don’t have alerts in!)
On this day you’re going to answer questions and make lists and put dates on your calendar.
What do I need to say “no” to in order to say “yes” to the most meaningful things this season?
Since Christmas adds in, are there things you need to cut out in order to make room? How can you manage your expectations? This might even mean talking to your boss if there are extra things required of you at work, and asking what regular responsibilities he or she thinks can be put on hold so that you will have adequate margin.
3. SET YOURSELF UP FOR SUCCESS
On your Christmas planning day, put dates on your calendar – the big things you want to make sure happen. Include scheduling in Sabbaths. Maybe make an appointment for a pedicure if it is in your budget.
Practice saying, “Thank you so much for thinking of me, but I’m already committed and need to say ‘no’ this time.”
If you’re having trouble scheduling your own family celebration plus time with in-laws, decide what’s best for your family and then give in-laws several options to choose from that will work for you. (Someone once told me, you need to approach in-laws like you do toddlers – assure them that you love them and give them acceptable choices :))
Prayerfully hold things lightly. Remember, you’re planning so that you won’t end up being highjacked by every urgent thing that comes up, but there may be last-minute changes you need to make, or holy interruptions that deserve your attention. Commit your plans to the Lord and ask Him to confirm or help you adapt.
Lord help me to move slowly enough to experience Jesus fully and love others deeply.
Plan to practice the Examenduring Advent. To help, you can upload the Lectio 365 app. It has an Evening prayer that guides you through a review of your day, helping you to slow down and pay attention to the presence of God in your life – especially valuable in the busy Christmas season.
What ideas have you seen this year that you want to remember for next year? Share with us in the comments!
More COLORED LIGHTS! MUSIC! PARTIES! ALL OF THE THINGS!
As an Enneagram 7 the “more” of Advent can be seductive, but ironically it is the opposite that God invites us into during this sacred waiting season.
Stillness instead of activity. Silence instead of noise. Wonder instead of worry.
The other day, God connected the dots for me in a way only He can.
My devotional reading was about Zechariah. In Luke 2:20 when he questions the angel in disbelief the angel says,
“and now you will be silent and not able to speak…”
Although this was a punishment, was silence also a gift to Zechariah in a way? What did this silence make possible?
What came to my mind was that perhaps Z experienced more of the sufficiency of God like it says in Psalm 46:10
“Be still and know that I am God.”
This thought was further impressed on me when I went to write a note and the verse on the front of the card reads:
“The Lord will fight for you. You only need to stand still”
Exodus 14:14
As these thoughts were swirling in my mind, we received a call from the choir director at our church who had been working for months on a classic Christmas concert including orchestra, soloists and choir that was scheduled for the next day.
He told us that after a 3 1/2 hour choir rehearsal one choir member had tested positive for Covid. In an abundance of caution, with great sorrow, they were canceling the choir portion of the evening.
This director was so disappointed, but he said, “God will still use this.” And He did. It was amazing.
And in the margin where the choir was to sing, we provided a time of silence. To breathe. To listen. To pay attention to the thin place between heaven and earth.
Maybe you’re reading this and you have kids and a demanding job and you can’t imagine silence. Or maybe you are alone and silence exacerbates loneliness.
Can I suggest one small act of resistance? (If your answer is “no”, stop reading :))
Early in the morning while it’s still dark, or late at night before you go to bed, bundle up, go outside and look up.
Be still.
Feel your smallness and God’s majesty.
Feel your belovedness.
Breathe in: “Jesus”
Breathe out: “You are with me in this place.”
What practices have been helpful to you this Advent? Share in the comments!
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Next Thursday we are going to have a quiet, candlelit worship service here in Lucerne, specifically for people who are grieving this Christmas.
Is that you? You may have had a miscarriage, or lost a parent, spouse, or friend, and there is an empty place at the table and in your heart. You are sad and weary.
As John and I were preparing last night, we were trying to choose a couple of hymns that give voice to feelings of loss, wilderness, and promises of hope in the darkness.
I was transported back to my childhood when every year we had the tradition of gathering at my aunt and uncle’s house with relatives young and old.
After dinner at the looooong table stretched with many leaves and augmented with card tables attached, we’d move to the piano.
It was a loud and joyful time, but today, at least four people are missing from this picture including my brother. Maybe your pictures are missing loved ones this year too.
Now here’s the thing. I come from a musical family. We had cousins and uncles playing french horn, trumpet, trombone. My grandfather played the violin. Aunts and cousins played the piano. I think for a few years there was a flute thrown in. Maybe an oboe.
I had nothing to contribute but my barely adequate voice added to those who were able to actually, you know… harmonize. (That’s me in the middle back in holiday pigtails 🙂 )
I’m holding music for my cousin who is playing an instrument, but I didn’t need it for the lyrics. I know virtually every word of every carol in the book. (Yes, even Angels From the Realms of Glory). The Christmas lyrics are part of my faith vocabulary, because my family sang them over me, and into me, and with me.
This year there may be lyrics of celebration that are hard for you to sing. Impossible even. It’s ok. Be gentle with yourself.
A friend of mine says sometimes we sing faith words with joy and confidence.
Sometimes we sing them as a declaration of the truth we believe in spite of how we may feel.
And sometimes we just can’t sing “Joy to the World”. We’re too sad, and we let the community carry the words for us, blanketing us with hope that God is still with us. He is still good. That’s ok. Let the community carry hope for you.
Is it hard for you to sing this advent? Share in the comments.
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As always, I’d love to have you join me over on Instagram! It’s my favorite place for small doses of joy and inspiration!
It’s 6 a.m. I sit in the dark, looking out the window of Starbucks at the twinkly white lights and a few snowflakes lazily dancing their way to the ground. It’s only the beginning of November, but if I’m not careful my mind can hopscotch right over Thanksgiving and land on thoughts of goals for stress about Christmas.
It’s coming. And we want sososososo much for it to be all about Jesus being born in us, meeting us on dark starry nights, overshadowing the chaos of the world with His peace that passes all understanding.
The Christmas our Katy was almost 2 years old, one day she took me by the hand and dragged me over to our manger scene that was set up by the fireplace hearth. (bottom left corner of the picture).
She pulled me down to sit in front of baby Jesus.
“Sit. Stay. Watch.” she commanded.
Ahhh such a precious invitation!
I believe Jesus will meet us anywhere we seek Him (yes, even in line waiting to see “Santa” in the mall), but He’s a gentleman and won’t barge in where He’s not welcome. As we approach the start of Advent, maybe we could respond to His invitation to sit with Him.
In June my friend Heather and I dreamed up a little project and prayed it would help people to meet with Jesus – really meet with Him, instead of reading a devotional with second-hand thoughts about Him. It was a “first effort,” and we’ve been working on creating an even better resource for Advent.
We want to get our new Advent Devotional Cards in your hands to help you press into Jesus this season.
Each card has a verse on one side, like the one above. On the flip side there is a longer reference if you want to read more in context and then a couple of simple invitations of ways to talk to Jesus about the verses. There’s white space if you want to draw or write your thoughts.
Here’s what I promise you:
They are simple.
They will invite you to look at, listen to, talk with Jesus.
They are portable and can be used in a variety of ways:
In Person. If you are going to be at an event where I’m speaking, I will bring some with me that you can buy for $17 🙂
On Line.If you live elsewhere you can order the cards byclicking on the sidebar for $20 (which includes tax and mailing) and we’ll send them to you asap! For bulk purchases (3 or more), contact us for shipping costs. (you can preorder today)
And if you’d be so kind…. If you receive these as a gift, we would love it if you might post a picture of yourself using them on social media with any (or all!) of these tags:
This is a post I edit and reprint every year because I need it. Hope it’s helpful to you too.
I really wish I liked Yoga more. It’s healthy. And it’s so in. But I’m not crazy about it.
Here are the only things I like about Yoga:
the comfy pants that are like legal pajamas,
the fact that you do it in a group with great people, and not, for example on a stationary bike in your basement (like a crazy introvert),
the corpse pose (where you lay still with soft music playing)…
And one more thing…
They remind you to breathe. In fact, I think that’s the only part I consistently get right when I go. I mess up all the poses. And I can’t make myself pretzely like my friend Brooke.
But then they say, “Don’t forget to breathe.” and I think “Yes! I’ve got that down! Score!” (Can you tell I’m better at competitive sports than contemplative ones?)
Sometimes the best I can do at Yoga is to just keep breathing. Sometimes in the Christmas season it seems that way also. You too?
Our to-to lists are too long. We drop balls and forget to follow through with details. And our regular spiritual practices and rhythm of time with Jesus may suffer.
But no matter what happens in the next few weeks, most (hopefully all) of us will still be breathing when we get to the New Year.
So what if breathing became a spiritual practice? It’s one many of you are probably familiar with. Breath prayer.Continue reading
Advent. Just the word rolling off your tongue, and the feels it conjures up, are such a contrast to “holiday hurry”, “cyber Monday”, and kids insisting “I NEED this for school TODAY!”
I pause at a stoplight, in morning traffic and think about that tension between the pace of life today and the measured minutes in Nazareth and Bethlehem long ago.
500 years of silence. The plodding slowness of Mary and Joseph walking 90 miles over dusty roads towards a stable where Glory would be delivered after hours of labor. The time to reflect. The lack of iPhones or speed or 24/7 news cycles.
No it wasn’t quiet. Or easy. But there was a slower rhythm built into life.
A life where conversations happened in person. Experiences were chatted about and evaluated while walking rocky roads or while doing unending chores of water-hauling, bread-baking, seed-planting.
Slowly.
For us slow is counter-cultural. It takes a commitment to go against the flow. But what might we notice of God and ourselves if we entered into a different rhythm? Continue reading
So I thought I was doing so much better with the jet-lag thing this time around, but maybe not. This morning I was awake at 4:00, up at 4:30 and out the door at 5:00. Problem is my Starbucks doesn’t open til 5:30. So I walked the long way, through the dark silent streets of my neighborhood, most folks still snuggled in their warm beds, dreaming of sugar plums or something.
It was cold and crisp and as my breath showed up in white wisps, it gave me a chance to pray and to reflect on the upcoming Advent season.
The silence and peace of the early morning was such a contrast to the noise, and hurry that can dominate this season when we long for the “heavenly peace” of Silent Night – to be preparing for Jesus.
It got me to thinking…What do you want for Advent this year? What do you love about Advent? What are your hopes? How do you make choices instead of allowing the world to squeeze you into its mold? I wrote last week about having a plan.
So, two questions that lead to choices around Advent:Continue reading
I’ve been thinking a lot this Advent season about the word “blessed”.
It all started with a post I read by Jamie Wright about the word “blessed” that quoted Inigo Montoyo from the Princess Bride: “You keep using this word. I do not think it means what you think it means.”
She wrote:
We’ve created a culture in which we measure God’s “blessings” in terms of dollars and cents, comfort and pleasure, wealth and well-being. So, if we’re happy and healthy and have everything we need, then we’re blessed, and we should thank God on social media. We tend to ignore the secondary message this sends to those who are unhappy or unhealthy, or for whom things are just generally crappy. Too bad, so sad, if your life sucks, you’re #NotBlessed.
The second thing that led me to focus on this word, “blessed” was that John and I were preparing to preach together on Mary, the mother of Jesus and there was that word again! In Luke 1 it refers to Mary twice as “highly favored” and then Mary herself says: Continue reading
