How to Combat One Feeling We All Deal With

Want some good news/bad news?

Recently I heard about a church in Thailand that gives out cupcakes every Sunday to those who have had a birthday that week. Sounds pretty great, right?

But why do they do this? Because in Thailand, when someone gives their life to Christ, often times family will disown them. Isolation and loneliness can lead to despair. This church says, “If no one will sing happy birthday to you, we will! We will be your family. Biblical community is important.”

You may not experience loneliness because you’ve been disowned by your family, but be honest, you’ve experienced it, right? And it is becoming a bigger issue than ever.

In Japan, so many people are dying alone there is an industry called lonely-death-cleanup. Companies are selling lonely death insurance to owners of apartment buildings to clean up after bodies are found, in order to make the apartment rentable again.

In “The All Better Book”, they asked elementary school kids: With billions of people in the world, someone should be able to figure out a system where no one is lonely. What do you suggest?

I love the answer Kalani gave (she’s 8): People should find lonely people and ask their name and address. Then ask people who aren’t lonely their name and address. When you have an even amount of each, assign lonely and not lonely people together in the newspaper.

Maybe a bit of an administrative challenge, but ok then!

The Bible has something to say about loneliness.

In Genesis we see God declare everything He has made, “good”. The one thing He says that is not good? To be alone. (Gen 2:8).

What is it that keeps us lonely. I can think of several things. Maybe you can add more.

1. Second-hand living. We’ve become people who watch others online doing things. Researchers have coined the term, “passive consumers”, describing our inclination to live alone together. We have lots of artificial connections through social media, but few real relationships.

2. Self-centeredness. Feeling lonely or left-out is terrible. It’s understandable sometimes if we take to wallowing in a “poor me” place. It’s easy to lose perspective, but what about all the other people out there who are hurting or lonely?

3. New seasons. You may have moved away from home for the first time, or started a new job, or become an empty nester. All of these things affect your relationships. You may not be naturally coming into contact with people who have been important to you in the past.

Scripture says,

God sets the lonely in families.

Psalm 68:6

But how? What’s our part in God’s plan?

To build true community you need to not just be a consumer, but become a contributor.

• What if you put down your phone and spent more time paying attention, interacting with the people around you?
• What if you pick up your phone and arranged to meet someone for coffee? Identify some people you’d like to get to know and reach out. Maybe they won’t become your new best friends, but that’s ok. Start somewhere.
• What if you brainstorm others who might need encouragement, a meal, a hug? Consider a mama with a newborn, the spouse of someone deployed in the military, a college student away from home for the first time, a person newly widowed or divorced?
• What if you volunteer to serve someplace where there are people with greater needs than your own?

• One last way you can build community, even if it isn’t face-to-face, is to interact here on the blog. Comment. Get to know others who comment. Encourage them. You all have so much wisdom to share!

Whether here or in real life, let’s commit to becoming more of an Acts 2 community. What have you done or what will you commit to do this week? Share in the comments!

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