Laura Crosby

Page 53 of 99

When You’re Not Enough

November 17, 2014 /

I’ve been feeling a little skittish lately…a little anxious and a little fearful – not like myself at all, but more like a hostess who’s afraid she’s going to run out of food.  Concerned there’s not enough, or that she’s not enough, or that she’s forgotten something important – like the meat.

Ironically, when I’m feeling off my game I usually need to listen most to what I’ve been teaching others.  So this morning when I woke up at 2:00 and again at 3:00 my mind turned to a passage that many of you know is very meaningful to me.  It is one I preached on in Zambia recently.

It’s the passage in 1 Kings 17 where God sends Elijah to the widow of Zarephath to ask her for a drink and a piece of bread.  The only problem is that she only has a handful of flour and a little oil. She’s preparing the last meal for herself and her son and then she figures they’ll die.

When Elijah makes his request she answers, “As surely as the Lord your God lives, I DON’T HAVE…”

Like the widow that’s usually our “go to”.  Think of a challenge you face today – relational, work-related, parenting, health-related – and where does your mind go? Continue reading

Theology of Sleep

November 14, 2014 /

Tuesday night our small group met as usual at my house.  After dinner we were curled up in our usual places in my living room, discussing Lectio Divina, the practice of slow, contemplative reading of a passage of Scripture.

Ready to apply this practice, we agreed to a time of silence before the Lord first and then one person would read the verses.  We closed our eyes and the silence was delightful, rare, welcome. I became aware of myself in the presence of God.  The silence stretched on and I thought, “Here I am Lord. This is good, because it is so seldom we do this.”

Silence, silence, more silence.

I thought, “Did I misunderstand?  Was I supposed to read the passage?”

Silence.

Finally I opened one eye and peeked.  Heather was trying hard not to laugh and pointing across the room to Molly who was fast asleep! Continue reading

What we Bring to the Table

November 12, 2014 /

Awhile ago we hosted a dinner party and it felt like a slow motion train-wreck.  Honestly.  At one point we were afraid one of our guests was going to leap over the table and physically attack another guest.

And to think I was upset beforehand that I didn’t have an appropriate soup tureen and ladle.  The stuff we worry about!

I haven’t watched Game of Thrones or the Red Wedding episode, but from what I hear, after this dinner I really don’t have to.

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To say there was tension would be an understatement.

Husband John and I have done quite a bit of post-mortem analysis and have asked what we can learn from this.

As I think about what was brought to the table (besides soup), I realize there was tremendous fatigue.  It had been a very long weekend in the midst of a busy season for most of us.  When we’re tired we’re not at our best.

We also brought preconceptions, insecurities, and judgment to the table.

But Fear was the uninvited guest we hadn’t expected.  Continue reading

What Does Thanksgiving Look Like From Where Someone Else is Sitting?

November 10, 2014 /

I got home from Zambia Friday afternoon, so happy to be back in my cozy home with a soft bed.

When I left, the trees were painted glorious and Halloween was immanent.

When I returned the trees were sad and bare, the sky gray, and Thanksgiving almost upon us.

The night I got home, I went to my gratitude journal which I hadn’t taken with me. I brought it up to date, adding the following to my list of things I’m thankful for:

  • Real toilets you can sit down on (as opposed to a hole in the ground)
  • Air conditioning (when it’s 97 degrees) and heat (when it’s 29 degrees and snowing, like this morning)
  • Good roads, traffic lights, and traffic laws that are (basically) adhered to (and a car to drive)
  • Dependable electricity that doesn’t capriciously shut off (I heard a story on MPR yesterday on what happens in the developing world when electricity goes off in the middle of an operation in a hospital.  Not good.)
  • WiFi
  • Fresh fruits and vegetables that are safe to eat
  • Clean, unlimited water I can drink safely out of a faucet in my home

These are NOT things that my friends in the slum in Lusaka could list, and yet last Sunday they spent an entire hour in praise and worship for the God who they know who is faithful and sufficient.

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(You can’t see it, but the line for water from the pump curves around to the right of the picture for a long way.  They could have used signs like at Disney World – 30 minutes from this point…)

You know that verse, “From the rising of the sun to the place where it sets, the name of the Lord is to be praised.”? Well, it seems like they take it seriously!  Go figure!  And this is not just lip service, but sincere praise with song and dance.

Contrast this with yesterday at my home church where we sang a couple of praise songs, and tossed up a couple of prayers like we were tossing candy off a parade float.

It’s not that we don’t appreciate God, but maybe that’s it.  We appreciate Him without truly acknowledging Him as the source of all that we have and are.  We just live without awareness.

We think of people in the developing world as “disadvantaged”, but maybe it’s really we who need that label.  Our abundance in the United States may be one of the things hindering a more intimate relationship with God.  Wasn’t control and desire for autonomy the root of Adam and Eve’s sin?  The more we have, the more we can live with the illusion of independence, right?  Why would we need God?

This is not to shame anyone, but a desire to live fully alive to God… A reminder to look around at all the things we take for granted and praise God that He has graciously given us all that we have.

What do you overlook that you’re thankful for today?

Not Taylor Swift

November 6, 2014 /

This morning you will wake up to tweets about “postpartum Taylor Swift disorder” and news about how Kim Kardashian is the hottest mom on the planet.

I want to tell you about someone you won’t see in your Facebook newsfeed, or on the Today Show.

This is one of my new friends who lives in a slum in Lusaka, Zambia.  Her name is Faith and she wears it well.

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Her husband is a pastor. She helps him with the ministry, and cares for six children.  And so that they can make ends meet, she raises chickens in her house.

200 chickens inside her house.  Because she can’t afford to build an outdoor coop. Continue reading

The Little Thing You’re Doing…Does it Matter?

November 2, 2014 /

I’m in Lusaka, Zambia.  It is 97 degrees and instead of red leaves falling off  the trees there are flamboyant red flowers. photo-9

We were checked for Ebola at the airport (even though it is nowhere near).  photo-10

And I ate fried caterpillars.

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And this morning I preached at a church in a slum that is vibrant with praise, singing and dancing.

Sound exciting and exotic?  Well maybe, but… Continue reading

Encouragement for Your Hard Race

October 27, 2014 /

photo-6It was a perfect day. 65 degrees and not a cloud in the sky. The blue above contrasted with the cornucopia of color, vibrant energy, and thousands of people around me on the National Mall in Washington D.C.  From the air I imagine it looked like a very busy colony of colorful ants.  I was at mile 11 on the Marine Corps Marathon route that our daughter Katy was running.

Although she’s run many half-marathons in different states, this was her first full and training for it had been difficult (What an understatement – like ANYONE training for a marathon has it easy!).

I had gotten her split time at 6 miles and she was on pace.  I peered over heads and around little kids as the runners kept streaming past me by the side of the road.  I kept craning my neck, looking so hard for the bright teal t-shirt I knew she was wearing.  I felt overcome with emotion –  hopes and dreams for, and pride in this precious daughter of mine.

I anxiously kept scanning the crowds of runners and praying for Katy, like the father of the prodigal son, willing him to come into view from afar off.photo-4

Is this a tiny bit of what our Heavenly Father feels as He watches us running our race of faith?  Is He picking us out of the crowd, fully aware of the miles when it’s going to be harder to keep putting one foot in front of another?   Continue reading

Right-sizing

October 25, 2014 /

It seems like spiritual formation often involves right-sizing.

There are times when we feel too small, sinful, irredeemable, insignificant, and God reminds us that we are beloved.  We matter.  His strength is perfected in our weakness.

But there are other times (many of them), when we get too full of ourselves.  We imagine ourselves the center of the universe, the masters of control and destiny.  And then, again, we need to be right-sized – to be reminded that we are a small part of God’s large story.  But this in itself is a glorious thing!

“To make us feel small in the right way is a function of art; men can only make us feel small in the wrong way.” E. M. Forster” Continue reading

That Wedding When I was Tempted to go all Norma Rae

October 22, 2014 /

A few weeks ago my husband John had to restrain me from totally losing it and making a scene at a wedding.  I was FURIOUS.  Fist-clenching, face-scrunching, steam coming out my ears furious.

“Why?”, you ask.  “What could possibly provoke near violence at a wedding?” Continue reading

The Prayer I Resist Praying

October 20, 2014 /

I was g-chatting with daughter Katy yesterday morning.  This is how it went…

Katy: Thanks for sending your Zambia itinerary! Turns out I may be traveling at the same time for work.

Me: Oh! Fun!  Where?

Katy: Kabul.

Me: WHATTTT????!!!  As in Kabul Afghanistan?

Katy: And this is why I told you over g-chat…to preserve my ear-drums.

We’ve made a boat-load of mistakes as parents.  Big ones, little ones, and ones we laugh at in retrospect, like the time John accidentally gave Maggie Ipecac instead of cough medicine in the middle of the night and wondered why she kept throwing up.

But one that looms large in my mind was when we let our then eighteen year old daughter, Maggie, graduate early from high school and go to live with a mission organization in Kibera – a terrible slum in Nairobi.

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We went to visit her in the rainy season of mud which just added to the despair.

There was someone stoned outside where she was living.

She told us of coming upon a toddler sitting alone in the dirt, chewing on a used condom.

What kind of terrible parent lets their child go live in such a place???

Well, apparently this one.

It’s a parenting choice that I’ve been tempted to regret, but one that God has used.

Today I was reading Acts 4:23-31.  Peter and John have just been released from the religious officials who were totally ticked off because they had healed a lame beggar and preached some crazy stuff about the power of Jesus and Him being the only way.  They come back to their friends and tell them everything that has happened.

And then they pray for a hedge of protection.

NOT.

They thank God and pray for BOLDNESS!  Not the go-plan I naturally gravitate towards for our family!

Note to self:  This does not say they prayed to have an EQ lobotomy or to be offensive for Jesus, but Peter and John have me thinking…

Does the kingdom advance without boldness?  Without taking the love of Jesus into dark places, trusting that He will be our light and our shield?

Holy buckets!  What does this mean for me, for you?  Boldness may not mean taking the light of Jesus half-way around the world, but just across town or into relationships that require supernatural love, or perseverance, or hard truth.

It has me praying with open hands, saying,

“We are yours.  Help us to be bold and brave and humble in carrying the light of your love into dark places.  Do what only You can do in us and through us.”

Is it hard for you, like Peter and John, to pray for boldness for yourself or your children?  How might God ask you to take His light into a dark place today?

 
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