Laura Crosby

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Three Questions to Ask Yourself When You’re Waiting

February 2, 2015 /

“Waiting is our destiny as creatures who cannot by themselves bring about what they hope for. We wait in the darkness for a flame we cannot light; we wait in fear for a happy ending we cannot write. We wait for a not yet that feels like a not ever. Waiting is the hardest work of hope.” Lewis Smedes

The other day a young mom asked if we could meet for coffee.  I had no idea what she wanted to talk about so when she said, “I want to ask what you’ve learned about waiting.” I’m sure my expression must have conveyed the incredulity I felt.  I wanted to say, “What??! Waiting  is one of my WORST things!

Couldn’t you ask about Gilmore Girls trivia or how to hone spy skills so you’re ready in case the CIA calls?  Those are my good things!

But no, it was waiting she was struggling with.  At least I could empathize because I’ve done a lot of it.

I remember the time I got trapped in my OBGYN’s exam room, sitting in my lovely paper gown on a table for an hour “And NO PHONE!” to call and remind someone I was there. Tiptoeing paper-garbed to the front desk did not seem to be a reasonable choice, and I thought as soon as I got dressed the Dr. would show up.

Even if not stuck in a Dr.’s office, most of us are waiting for something.  Waiting for a job or a baby or a husband or healing or whatever.

Turns out a lot of us can relate to not being good “wait-ers”.  The Today Show talked about a recent study that said: Continue reading

You are Stronger than You Think

January 30, 2015 /

The other day, two things happened.  I saw this video and I realized I’m stronger than I think.

No, I’m never going to be a pull-up dancer. I know this might surprise you.  I’m not strong in that way.

But as I was driving along a person came to mind who brought me great pain in the past, and I felt…indifference!  Then I thought of an experience that had had great destructive power in my life, and I felt…fine!  Actually, I felt great!  I could think about the experience and appreciate what I learned without reliving the pain. I was strong in a new way!  Stronger than I thought.  I bet you are too.

STRONGER is my One Word this year, so it was weird when it struck me that there are areas where I’ve already grown stronger over the years.

Stronger can sneak up on you when you’re not looking.  We can say “Aha, Stronger!  I recognize you!”

Yes, it requires discipline and truth-telling and exercising flabby muscles over time. It’s a daily 3 mile run rather than a dash into the grocery store.  We do our work and God does His work and somehow we get better. Stronger.

We let weak win when we give power to people or experiences in our lives that don’t deserve it.

We get stronger when we say “Nope!” over and over again. “The only One who deserves power in my life to define me or carry me or approve me or interpret life for me is Jesus.”

We’re I’m so paranoid about seeming braggy that I sometimes neglect to celebrate the small victories of change. But the other day I felt it was time to celebrate and thank God for stronger.

So, what’s one area of your life where you can celebrate growth?  What is one way you’ve grown stronger?

 

When You’re Heavy with Too Much to Pray About

January 28, 2015 /

“I look at God, I look at you, and I keep looking at God.” —Julian of Norwich

I’m in the ministry so I naturally get a lot of prayer requests.  People figure it’s in my job description.

But lately it seems like there are so many more prayers than ever. So much pain, so much heaviness.

There’s all the cancer (which, let’s face it, could fill a prayer book alone), and infertility and loneliness, and job-searching, and broken relationships, not to mention that world-going-to-hell-in-a-hand-basket stuff.

I go to sleep praying and when I wake in the middle of the night I figure it’s God poking me and it’s time to pray again.  I get a note or a phone call or I see someone and I try to pray in the moment. But sometimes it just feels soooo heavy.  Like too much.

But here’s what I think we get wrong. Continue reading

Everything Counts

January 26, 2015 /

Thanks to my friend Nancy Beach for prompting this post and for her great reminders this weekend!

I love Jesus, but I’m not the “share-the-Gospel-with-the-person-sitting-next-to-you-on-the-plane-and-pray-THE PRAYER-with-them-on-the-one-hour-flight-to-Chicago” kind of person.

Don’t get me wrong. I think any way we can authentically communicate the overwhelming love and grace of Jesus is cool. I’m super intimidated inspired by those who have the spiritual gift of evangelism.  That’s just not me.

My “evangelistic” efforts look more like “Hi, tell me about…” and “Want to come over for…” and “Can I help?”  Hesitant baby steps of relationship building.  I’m often tempted to think this doesn’t “count” in the world of REAL EVANGELISM. Continue reading

Stronger in Marriage

January 23, 2015 /

The other night two things happened.  I had my favorite salad at a cute little candlelit wine bar with friends, and John and I needed a do-over.

In the salad is sweet potatoes, spinach, pomegranate seeds, apples, golden raisins, goat cheese, bacon, and sunflower seeds.  I would never have thought to put all that different stuff together, but it’s awesome!

And that’s the kind of marriage John and I have.  We’re really different, but we naturally go together well.  I think we have a super strong marriage and although there have been seasons when I thought we could use a little less goat cheese in our salad, all in all we’ve had it pretty easy..photo-1

Which actually can be a negative because we can get lulled into complacency.

Maybe, it’s because it’s usually easy that it was a little surprising when John and I hit a little hiccup the other day…a misunderstanding in how to love each other well and we ended up hurting each other instead of helping each other.

It was an opportunity for us to say “How can we grow stronger in our marriage?” Continue reading

4 Habits of Happy People

January 21, 2015 /

The Huffington post had a fascinating article recently called 7 Habits of Unhappy People.  In it the author quotes Psychology Today research that states “40 percent of our capacity for happiness is within our power to change.”

Looking at those negative habits, I’ve been thinking about the habits that lead to happiness, or rather, I’d say joy, because I see joy as independent of circumstances.  Anyway, potato, potahto…

Here’s what I’ve come up with: Continue reading

Why we Need the Discipline of Looking Up

January 19, 2015 /

Have you ever thought about what down-lookers we are?  Everyday I get stuck looking down.  Down at my to-do list, and at the pairs of feet in line in front of me. Down the city street at traffic holding me up, down at my computer screen, down at the veggies I’m cutting up for dinner, and down at my shoes striking the pavement as I run, dodging ice or slush.

That changed for awhile this week when I had the incredible joy of joining a friend for a play date in Florida.

And in addition to all kinds of play and laughter and good conversation, we took time to look up.  A lot.

We looked up, towards the stars and the sun and the horizon and the magical rhythmic dance of day and night and day again.

We watched the sunset every night and marveled at the shape and color of the clouds and the crazy pelicans above, who in one moment can glide gracefully in formation over the water like the Blue Angels, and in the next minute plop straight down onto the water to catch a fish in the most UNgraceful mini cannonball move. IMG_9214 IMG_9222

As I was watching the sunrise this morning, and thinking how it was nighttime for my friends on the other side of the world, I also thought how this looking up is one of the most important disciplines of my life with God.FullSizeRender-2 Continue reading

When You Feel Unvaluable

January 14, 2015 /

My top three strengths are “activator” and “achiever” and “woo”. That means I really, really, really want to do ALL OF THE THINGS, to be awesome, and to have you like me.

So it stung, hearing the words. Out loud.  Again. A phrase similar to others I’ve heard over the years.

My husband John was recounting his day and a meeting he had had with a member of the church who had listened and given insight on the future of our faith community. John and his colleague in the meeting asked this awesomely awesome guest to return for another hour of conversation.

“Of course this will be pay-rolled!  We value your gifts and talents and expertise, so ABSOLUTELY we’ll pay you for your time!”

“Said no one to me ever”, is the place my slightly over-dramatic mind went to as I listened to him.

Validation. Whether you’re twenty-something, or….well, not… we all long for it and even when we get it in one form, we want more, or different.  We’re desperate to know we matter.  We add value.  We make a difference. Continue reading

5 Questions About Your Time

January 12, 2015 /

Time.  I’ve always felt like it’s there in limitless supply.

Oh, yeah, there are stress-filled days where there don’t seem to be enough minutes in 24 hours to get everything done, but there’s always Tuesday and Wednesday and June 25th 2020, full to the brim with more of life to live.

I buy into the conviction that I need to be responsible for stewarding my time well, but I also live like a perpetually bullet-proof twenty-something.

Over the past nine months John and I have had a friend teach us much about living and dying, about heaven and earth, time and eternity.  HIs name is Steve and he is dying of Pancreatic cancer.  He and his wife, Sharol, have walked this hard road with authenticity, faith, courage and vulnerability.  I asked Steve if I could share some of his thoughts on time in the post today.  These reflections come from a place of physical weakness and a greater awareness of limited time. Continue reading

Two Ways to Lean Into Your One Word

January 9, 2015 /

My friend Nancy has like the most awesome, toned arms of anyone I know.  And she’s my age which, let’s just say isn’t twenty-something.  When she is on stage sometimes it’s hard to concentrate on what she’s saying because I’m wondering what I’d have to do to get those well-sculpted arms in place of my soft, wobbly ones that cause me to shy away from anything sleeveless.

I know, it sounds a little whacky, but tell me you’ve never coveted a specific body part of someone else!  Anyway, stick with me here.

It’s not magic.  Nancy didn’t drift into arm amazingness. Just like people don’t drift into spiritual maturity.  Just like you and I aren’t going to drift into our One Word for 2015.

Change is a greedy, stubborn varmint.  He requires intention and attention if he’s gonna come through for us with sculpted arms, or growth in character.

I told you about my One Word fail last year, so I’m doing things a little differently this year with my One Word – STRONGER. Continue reading

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