During Covid I did a puzzle that absolutely drove me crazy. There was so much white. And black. And pieces that looked the same.
It took a tremendous amount of patience and perseverance (two things that are NOT my strong suit!). I actually came to see it as a spiritual discipline – stretching muscles that ached and didn’t want to be stretched.
I wrote last week that we’re in a season of transition, like many of you are. Again, this is not my strong suit. The hundreds of white puzzle pieces, like ordinary days can seem to be baffling. Where do they go? How do they help make sense of the whole?
When we read Bible stories we can see the whole picture. We can jump to the end and see how things turn out. But David didn’t know how things were going to unfold when he had been anointed king, and Saul was chasing him around the countryside trying to kill him! Esther didn’t know the specifics of God’s plan to use her to save the Jews. They trusted God and took the next right step.
A friend of mine said to me, “I wish I had known on May 5th that I would have a job on Dec. 5th. Because I didn’t, I lived in the house of fear.”
Here are 3 suggestions for when God is puzzling:
1. Step back and thank God for the bigger picture that He is creating with all the pieces of your life – the boring white ones, the confusing ones, the seemingly ugly ones, and the beautiful ones.
..keep a firm grip on the faith. The suffering won’t last forever. It won’t be long before this generous God who has great plans for us in Christ—eternal and glorious plans they are!—will have you put together and on your feet for good. He gets the last word; yes, he does.
1 peter 1:10-11
2. Remind yourself of God’s sovereignty. He knows what we don’t know. He sees what we don’t see. He is a good God.
We humans keep brainstorming options and plans, but God’s purpose prevails.
Proverbs 19:21 MSG
3. Ask: Lord, what do you want to refine in me through this?
We are not defined by our circumstances, but merely refined through them. We can view our circumstances as happening to us or for us.
Friends, when life gets really difficult, don’t jump to the conclusion that God isn’t on the job. Instead, be glad that you are in the very thick of what Christ experienced. This is a spiritual refining process, with glory just around the corner.
1 Peter 4:12-13
If you’re going through a time of change, you might also like to sign up for my free resource to help you process with the Lord. It will give you Scripture and some journal prompts.
I’d love to hear what kind of change you’re navigating in the comments below!
The sweet aroma of lilacs envelops me as I bike under the canopy of leafy trees, shading our street. I breathe deep and whisper a prayer of gratitude.
A friend of mine calls this “the lifiest time of the year.” The peonies are finally ready to bloom. The grass needs mowing.
It’s June. Your high-schooler or kindergartener or college student is graduating. Someone is getting married and someone is having a baby and others are starting new jobs or moving.
With the celebration of every new “lifey” thing, there is also a releasing, even a grieving for what is ending or dying.
We have recently moved from California back to Minnesota where life has gone on without us. I’m grieving not having an in-person church home anymore, not having family nearby, not having a clear calling in this season…But I’m also celebrating the lakes and reconnecting with old friends.
Years ago, a mentor of mine likened navigating seasons of change to being a trapeze artist. There is that scary moment when you have to let go of one bar to grab onto the new one coming towards you. The new bar may be exciting, but it also may be hard to let go of the one you’ve been holding.
How do we courageously let go of the past and reach for the future? Can we honestly name the deaths without missing the new life…celebrating both the new blessings, and those of the past?
Some big transitions we naturally mark with ceremonies, or family gatherings, but what about the smaller, quieter changes?
Maybe you need to look back through old photos or journals, have a good cry and buy a new one, yielding the next season to God’s will.
It might look like a discussion around your family dinner table, each person naming one joy of the past season that they’ll miss, and one thing they’re looking forward to.
Maybe it will mean taking a walk with a friend, processing the valuable lessons you’ve learned, and any invitation from God you’re sensing in the coming season. There may be things you are glad to leave behind.
Or it might look like praying with open hands, naming the things you’re relinquishing, while thanking God for the new experiences that await you, trusting in His creative life-giving goodness. If you’re facing challenges in this next season it may mean praying for the courage to make hard choices.
Lord, today I celebrate Your goodness and faithfulness in this past season – the gift of friendships, new adventures, a clear place to belong, and assignments from You. I confess I miss these gifts, but I also anticipate Your kindness and direction in this next season. I yield myself to You. I want to greet each day with an adventurously expectant, “What’s next, Papa?” May Your will be my delight. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
What are you leaving behind? What are you anticipating as you reach forward?Stay tuned for a free resource to help you reflect with God and set yourself up for a flourishing new season!
On this blog I share stories from my life, but my deepest prayer is that they wouldn’t be just about me, but about all of us and our quest to see the hand of God in all of life. Even though this was written 10 years ago, and a lot has changed, I hope it’s meaningful for parents and sons and daughters alike.
A Letter to my Daughters, May, 2012
Dear Precious Girls,
As I write this we’re on our third flight coming home from Sri Lanka, through Mumbai and Amsterdam. Too much time to think. Feeling out of sync with time changes, and nostalgic, and ready to sleep in my own bed and be in a normal summer routine that includes Minnesota lakes and green grass.
In this season, traveling to exotic places, experiencing the humidity and dust of ancient cultures, the taste of unusual spices and the the smell of incense and poverty, I am grateful. But I also long for home and the simplicity of summer days when you both were little.
Playing Monopoly and hopscotch on the driveway, picking strawberries, and making water balloons, and walking to the library as we were serenaded by cicadas. Creating forts and reading Betsy, Tacy, and Tib aloud on hot summer afternoons that we savored like melting popsicles, slurping up the goodness of the day.
I think in contrast, of this season of your life now, as young professional women living in D.C. where you have a vibrant faith community, stimulating dialog about important ideas, and the opportunity to experience Supreme Court arguments, Embassy receptions, and White House fireworks. A good, good season.
I want you to savor every moment, drink up every drop. To choose life in all its fullness.
This is the season of your life when you’ll set courageous goals and experience lovely victories and maybe fall flat on your face some too. You’ll nurture friendships, look to wise mentors, and invest in causes that are deeply meaningful.
It’s the season when you get to ask yourself, “What story do I want to be able to tell in fifteen years?”
Will it matter what Netflix you binged on, or that you had the courage to stand up for what’s right, or learned the name of the homeless guy on your corner, or invited that lonely person to church? What will you remember? What will make a difference? What will grow your character?
In this season I pray you’ll pause, not only to acknowledge the good gifts, but also the Gift Giver. Yeah, I know there are rough days with job stress, and not enough money, and bad hair days, and questions about what’s next and where, but still…
I may be tempted to look back with longing, and you to look forward with longing, but meanwhile there’s today. Gregory Boyle quotes Thich Nhat Hahn saying “our true home is the present moment.”
The Desert Fathers would repeat one word over and over. Not “Jesus” or “Love”, but the word, “today”. It reminded them where they needed to be.
So today, where you are, and where I am, let’s just choose life and thanksgiving in the present. God is good. We get to sing “Great is Thy Faithfulness” in every season. May He write an inspiring paragraph through your life today.
And when you come home this summer for a visit, let’s be sure to play Monopoly and go to Dairy Queen.
love,
Mama
What are you praying for your children? Let me know in the comments and I’ll join you in prayer.
It’s summertime, which for me conjures up memories of being at the “Lake House” with my cousins, perpetually in a wet swim suit, rarely out of the lake. One of the many games we would play was “who-can-hold-their-breath-longest-without-dying”.
Ok, it wasn’t a real active game, but you know…simple pleasures. And nobody actually died so our parents considered it a win.
Sometimes, as adults, without even thinking about it, we play life like the “who-can-hold-their-breath-longest-without-dying” game.
When I started running, I became much more aware of the importance of rhythm and rest, and basics. Like breathing. And not holding our breath til we, you know, pass out.
This is not about Sabbath, butSelah. Selah is a term used mostly in the Psalms and a few times in Habbakuk that is a bit of a mystery. Scholars aren’t positive what it means, but they think it means “rest” or “pause”.
Mark Batterson says, like in music, if Sabbath is a full rest, maybe Selah is a sixteenth rest. A chance to catch your breath.
Or maybe Selah is the life jacket that helps us pop up above the water of everyday stress.
If, as Eugene Peterson says, Sabbath is a day of “shutting down and shutting up.” maybe Selahmoments are those in your day where you stop to think about breathing.Reorient, and remember that you’re not in control, but you know the One who is.
Maybe Selah is a chance to:
Let go. Unclench your hands and surrender to the one who is God since we are not. I have to pray the Welcoming Prayer as a reminder to myself: “Holy Spirit, I let go of my need for approval. Welcome. I let go of my need for power and control. Welcome. I let go of my need to change any person, circumstance or emotion. Welcome.”
Look. “Look at the birds of the air…” Pay attention to the miracles all around. I’m trying to be disciplined in stopping, standing still outside and looking around, praying: “Creator God, thank you for…”
Listen. Our speaking comes out of our listening. What we say comes out of what we hear. We can pray: “Lord, what do you have to say to me about Yourself and myself today?” Listen to words about God’s character in Psalm 46 where Selah is written in the margin in most translations after verse 3.
Mark Buchanan put it this way: When we don’t rest we’re in danger of letting ourselves be “consumed by the things that feed the ego but starve the soul.”
Stopping to breathe in the goodness and sufficiency of God gives oxygen to our souls.
Selah.
You don’t have to hold your breath all day. Consider setting an alarm on your phone to remind you to stop and breathe. (Isn’t it crazy how natural that is for kids? And puppies? They delight in the breaths of each moment.)
What does Selah look like for you?
This is an edited repost from the past. Because I need to remind myself to breathe 🙂
Note:This is a repost from years ago – a reminder for myself.
It’s summertime, which for me conjures up memories of being at the “Lake House” with my cousins, perpetually in a wet swim suit, rarely out of the lake. One of the many games we would play was “who-can-hold-their-breath-longest-without-dying”.
Ok, it wasn’t a real active game, but you know…simple pleasures. And nobody actually died so our parents considered it a win.
Sometimes, as adults, without even thinking about it, we playlife like the “who-can-hold-their-breath-longest-without-dying” game.
When I started running, I became much more aware of the importance of rhythm and rest, and basics. Likebreathing. And not holding our breath til we, you know, pass out.
This is not about Sabbath, butSelah. Selah is a term used mostly in the Psalms and a few times in Habbakuk that is a bit of a mystery. Scholars aren’t positive what it means, but they think it means “rest” or “pause”.
Mark Batterson says, like in music, if Sabbath is a full rest, maybe Selah is a sixteenth rest. A chance to catch your breath.
Or maybe Selah is the life jacket that helps us pop up above the water of everyday stress.
If, as Eugene Peterson says, Sabbath is a day of “shutting down and shutting up.” maybe Selah moments are those in your day where you stop to think about breathing.Reorient, and remember that you’re not in control, but you know the One who is.
But even if you don’t pray the hours, maybe Selah is a chance to
Let go. Unclench your hands and surrender to the one who is God since we are not. I have to pray the Welcoming Prayer as a reminder to myself: “Holy Spirit, I let go of my need for approval. Welcome. I let go of my need for power and control. Welcome. I let go of my need to change any person, circumstance or emotion. Welcome.”
Look. “Look at the birds of the air…” Pay attention to the miracles all around. I’m trying to be disciplined in stopping, standing still outside and looking around, praying: “Creator God, thank you for…”
Listen. Our speaking comes out of our listening. What we say comes out of what we hear. Listen to words about God’s character in Psalm 46where Selah is written in the margin in most translations after verse 3.
Mark Buchanan put it this way: When we don’t rest we’re in danger of letting ourselves be “consumed by the things that feed the ego but starve the soul.”
Stopping to breathe in the goodness and sufficiency of God gives oxygen to our souls.
Selah.
You don’t have to hold your breath all day. Consider setting an alarm on your phone to remind you to stop and breathe. (Isn’t it crazy how natural that is for kids? And puppies? They delight in the breaths of each moment.)
I was at war. In case you’re a pacifist reading this blog, I thought it only fair I should warn you.
I’m usually a peaceful person, but was pushed and I fought back. My enemy? The psycho squirrels who live in our yard and were trying to occupy new territory in our garage.
It all started when we did a little trimming on the large maple tree in our back yard. Part of it had died, leaving a hollow branch – a branch that squirrels had found to be a cozy condo during our long Minnesota winters. I think they had installed a fireplace and a Jacuzzi.
Well we desperately wanted to save it so we had to cut it back. I’m not sure, but we might have damaged their Jacuzzi.
This seemed to irritate them. The next thing I know I’m sitting on the patio under the tree and a squirrel hurls a grenade at me! Ok, not a grenade, but close. I’m not kidding! Here’s the evidence.
Before I knew it, every time I went outside there was a defiant squirrel blocking my path, basically saying “Make my day!” in that evil squirrely way they have. Every time I went into the garage to get in the car I could feel them watching me.
So about now you may be wondering two things. Is this woman crazy? And what does this have to do with paying attention to God or the Ukraine?
Well, the other day my husband John and I had a little “discussion”. We both wanted to go two different places together, but….there was some disagreement on the mode of transportation, the exact timing and the goals and objectives we wanted to accomplish at said destinations (you know, the crucial stuff you have to decide when going to the store and to a party).
We got into this intense conversation that we agreed was RIDICULOUS, and went on for a length of time I’m embarrassed to admit. In the middle of our fight I thought, “SQUIRREL! This is a ‘squirrel’! Why are we wasting time and energy trying to exert control over this?”
Later I was reflecting on this as I was walking and the song “Instruments of Peace” came on.
In my little world, whether it’s an argument with my husband, or an issue with a colleague that requires forgiveness, or a random encounter with someone very different from me it’s not World Peace, but… maybe it’s still important.
I may not have the platform or influence of Brené Brown, but maybe for today God is calling me to pursue peace with the “squirrels” in my life.
“Make us, instruments of peace. Where there’s hatred let love reign.”
Maybe today it means building a bridge by talking to someone I don’t think I have anything in common with.
“Make us, instruments of peace. In dissonance bring harmony.”
Having a hard conversation and reallylistening to the perspective of someone I think I disagree with.
“Make us, instruments of peace. Bringing hope to hopeless things.”
Letting go of my need for control and dying to my own agenda.
“Oh Prince of Peace your song we sing, To be sons and daughters of the king.”
Praying God’s blessing on someone who has refused to forgive me.
“Salaam. Shalom.”
It’s not world peace, but maybe we need to start small. With squirrels.
What does pursuing peace look like in your world today?
“Leadership is a series of hard conversations.” Yikes. A friend of ours said this to us years ago, and it has proven to be uncomfortably true.
Sometimes we’re on the initiating end of the hard conversation, sometimes on the receiving end. Many times both.
In ministryleadership, we invest maybe more deeply than other arenas, and get hurt more profoundly…
Maybe it’s because of our perceptions of what love should look like – all grace no truth.
Maybe it’s because we feel a deeper connection to each other in the Body of Christ, and therefore have a deeper sense of betrayal when we’re on the receiving end of criticism or rejection.
Maybe it’s because we’re all so, so human and as hard as we try, We. All. Mess. Up.
Can I suggest two principles as we all walk through leadership challenges and hard conversations in different contexts? I share these because they are what I am preaching to myself!
1. Expect the best of others.
Love…Always looks for the best, Never looks back, But keeps going to the end.
1 Cor. 13:7 MSG
We all create narratives to explain our actions and those of others, right? So, what’s the story I’m telling myself and others to interpret this event? Sadly, when I stop to ask myself this question, the truth of Steven Covey’s quote is often evident.
“We judge ourselves by our intentions and others by their behavior.”
Steven covey
Years ago we had a close friend who was the founding pastor of a church that he had poured his life into. He discerned that he had taken the church as far as it could go.
This pastor knew he needed to move on, and so did the faith community, but after he announced his leaving, he discovered an HR situation on staff that was confidential and potentially very divisive. He quietly withdrew his resignation in order to deal with the situation and not leave the mess for the pastor who would follow him.
He didn’t tell people why he changed his mind because it would be embarrassing for the others involved. People heaped on criticism. Why was he being wishy-washy? Why couldn’t he let go? He silently took the unwarranted taunts and fixed the problem before retiring, leaving a healthier culture for his successor.
When we are critical of a leader, we need to ask, “How would I want people to interpret this if I was in their shoes?”
We need to be humble enough to admit there may be circumstances we’re not aware of that can’t be made public.
We need to be teachable enough to question for better understanding.
2. Speak the truth in love directly and do not gossip…
…even though that makes us feel oh so superior. (I may say this from first-hand experience. Ahem) Matthew 18:15 exhorts us to go directly to a person with our concerns.
God wants us to grow up, to know the whole truth and tell it in love—like Christ in everything. We take our lead from Christ, who is the source of everything we do.
Ephesians 4:15-16 MSG
Recently, we have experienced hard truth from some folks who also communicate “I’m for you. I’m sharing this with you because I care.” We are grateful. The most helpful are those who have spoken hard truth in love and alsohave said, “I’ve been in a similar situation. I know firsthand how hard this is.”
But then, unfortunately there are those people who speak the “truth” with an attitude of self-righteous anger or divisiveness.
Being a leader isn’t for the faint of heart. It takes an identity firmly rooted in the security of being God’s beloved no matter how many times you mess up.
Leadership takes courage that can only come from God.
It takes courage to do what is unpopular.
It takes courage to admit when you are wrong.
It takes courage to persevere when you’ve messed up.
Leadership is a series of hard conversations. Can we agree we’re in this together, doing our best to follow Jesus, extending both grace and truth in love?
The Lord upholds all who fall and lifts up all who are bowed down.
Psalm 145:14 NIV
What about you?
Has a leader hurt you?
Have you experienced truth-telling in a healthy way or have you experienced being judged harshly from a distance?
Have you criticized a leader and learned later there were factors you were unaware of?
When I think cozy winter thoughts I think candles, soup, and books. I love lighting a candle in the morning to remind me of God’s presence. Anyone else? Even though it’s not typical winter weather where we’re currently living, I thought I’d share some soup, Sabbath, and book ideas this weekend. Hope they are encouraging to you!
Soup
I’ve often quoted a mentor of mine who said, “If you don’t have enough margin in your day to take a pot of soup to someone in need, you don’t have enough margin.” As a general rule, I agree!
“Soup is cold-weather-dark-sky food. Soup is peasant food – odds and ends, bits and pieces, a way to stretch a piece of meat or a handful of rice… Soup is the wool sweater, not the little black dress. It’s the cardigan with elbow patches, not the pressed shirt and tie.”
shauna Niequist
Here’s a really easy soup recipe I give away a lot, and I posted another one on Instagram on January 17th if you want to look there.
My very flexible recipe for Chicken Tortellini Soup:
Sauté 1/2 cup chopped onion, 1/2 cup chopped celery, 1/2 cup (or more) chopped carrots in 1/4 cup butter.
Slowly stir in 1/4 cup flour and 4 cups chicken broth (box of Swansons).
Add some rotisserie chicken (I buy it chopped up at the store) and a package of cooked cheese tortellini. I also usually add a teaspoon of “Better than Bouillon”.
Years ago a friend gave me the idea of picking up baskets at garage sales to give away meals in!
Books
I have never used a book journal, but I feel like this one has enriched my life! If you’re a reader, I highly recommend “My Reading Life” by Anne Bogel!
It has so many great features, with suggestions of books in every genre, quotes, guidance for book group discussions, and of course a great format for recording your thoughts about the books you read.
I really hesitate to recommend books, because everyone’s taste is a little different. That’s one of the reason’s I like that Anne differentiates between your rating of how much you enjoyed the book, how well it was written, and your overall rating.
For example, I recently read Anxious People by Fredrik Backman – the same author who wrote A Man Called Ove. I wouldn’t say I enjoyed reading the book (the characters were really annoying), but it was well-written and it provided good insight into people very different from me, so I was glad I read it.
If you are looking for a creepy thriller, I’d recommend The Turn of the Key by Ruth Ware. If you want WW2 fiction about strong women, check out The Kitchen Front by Jennifer Ryan. These books are very different, but I liked both of them!
And two more very different books… Live No Lies by John Mark Comer (non-fiction about culture, lies, our souls and Satan!) took me forever to get through because there are so many insights I wanted to think about.
I’ve shared here before that Sabbath is a challenging spiritual discipline for me, but one I think is important. On Instagram last week I shared that one way it helps me to think of is is this:
But that takes intention and preparation, right? And it’s going to look different if you have little kids from if you’re an empty nester.
Do you Sabbath? What does it look like? How do you prepare beforehand? I’d love to hear from you in the comments!
“Ordinary.” Ugh. What a terrible word! It’s mundane, boring, like “fine” (the official “f word” in our family), monotonous…
We are entering into the part of the church’s liturgical year called “Ordinary Time”. It is every day that isn’t Advent, Christmas, Lent, or Easter.
I may not like the way it sounds, but as I was walking our daughter’s dog the other day, a question captured my attention that impacted the way I think of ordinary time.
First of all, the shepherds are my favorites in the Christmas story. So I was thinking about them when a question formed.
They have this wham bam shazam encounter with a heavenly host, go to Bethlehem and meet the baby they’ve been told is the Messiah, return to their fields telling everyone the latest gossip about their experience, but then what?
It’s 30 years before Jesus starts His ministry. What do the shepherds do in the ordinary in between time?
What does “ordinary” life look like after their extraordinary experience?
Do people mock them when something different doesn’t happen right away?
Do they follow Jesus when He goes public?
Are the same shepherds alive when Jesus is crucified and comes back to life?
I think too about Mary and all the ordinary days she experienced before and after Jesus’ birth. If Mary hadn’t gotten to know God’s character on the ordinary days before the angel told her she was pregnant, she wouldn’t have been able to trust Him on the extraordinary days.
“…we live in the utterly mundane. We exist in the bathrooms, bedrooms, living rooms, and hallways of life. This is where the character of our life is set. This is where we live the life of faith.”
Paul David Tripp
What we do in ordinary time is important. What we pay attention to forms the foundation of our faith.
Look at all the words that Mary uses to describe the God she became acquainted with on ordinary days before the angel came.
And Mary said:
“My soul glorifies the Lord
47 and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior,
48 for he has been mindful
of the humble state of his servant.
From now on all generations will call me blessed,
49 for the Mighty One has done great things for me—
holy is his name.
50 His mercy extends to those who fear him,
from generation to generation.
51 He has performed mighty deeds with his arm;
he has scattered those who are proud in their inmost thoughts.
52 He has brought down rulers from their thrones
but has lifted up the humble.
53 He has filled the hungry with good things
but has sent the rich away empty.
54 He has helped his servant Israel,
remembering to be merciful
55 to Abraham and his descendants forever,
just as he promised our ancestors.”
Luke 1:46-55
Mary says “my spirit rejoices in God my Savior”, NOT in her circumstances, not in the extraordinary, or the hard, or the good, or the ordinary.
So, what are we paying attention to on all the ordinary days?
Where are you experiencing God’s mercy, His might, His filling, His help on these days in “Ordinary Time”?
I sit in front of a cheery fire, late at night, looking at our glowing Christmas tree. It’s still delightful, even with gifts gone from underneath. We’ve had a lovely holiday season in spite of Covid and allofthethings.
We lit candles. We sang carols. We marveled at Christmas lights and lifted our gaze to wonder at stars in the night sky.
Jesus was born in us again. Glory to God in the highest heavens. And glory to God in the lowest stable.
Still, there are things I wish I had done differently.
In the Christmas season, everything is MORE.
We feel everything MORE intensely – the good and the bad. We add in MORE to our already-packed-no-margin schedules. We drink MORE and eat MORE and bake MORE.
And all that MORE comes at a price.
If you’re like me, Advent can creep up on you and all of a sudden you’re in the middle of it, scrambling to fit in everything.
SO here are three things I’m doing to make next year even better:
1. MAKE A LIST NOW!
Right now, make a google doc or a paper list if that’s your jam (make sure to put it in a safe place).
Consider having a conversation with your family if you want to include them. Evaluate Christmas 2021. Discuss these questions:
What worked well for Christmas 2021?
What mistakes do we want to avoid for Christmas 2022?
List ideas you read about this year that you’d like to do next year.
Consider getting a plastic bin and labeling it Christmas 2022. In it you can put things like books, gifts, Christmas lights, or cards that you buy on sale in January.
HOSPITALITY
What did you bake that you liked?
What menus worked?
Did you entertain too much or do you wish you had done more?
What helped make entertaining less stressful?
Are there specific types of gatherings you’d like to create?
SOUL CARE
What spiritual practices, devotionals, or books did you read that were meaningful? Are there ones you’ve seen others use that you’d like to try next year?
The best things I did this year were to participate in a half day Advent retreat early in December (you can also purchase portable retreats here), and use the Quiet Christmas Collection by Emily P. Freeman.
DECORATING
Take pictures before you take down decorations if you want to duplicate next year. Save links to that mantel you saw on Instagram that you’d like to try. Make note of what needs to be replaced (like Christmas lights).
CREATING
IF you love creating, make a list linking to ideas of things you’d like to make next year. Things you’ve seen for hostess gifts, family traditions, decorating, or party themes.
Are there traditions you’d like to start? I read about this idea from prvrbsthirtyonegirl that I LOVE and even though I don’t have kids at home, I might create one for John and me! Ally and Ryan have one family activity for each day of Advent. You can make your own list that fits with your life stage!
Every year I used to read The Best Christmas Pageant Ever aloud to the family, a chapter a night. This year my book group read Truman Capote’s A Christmas Memory which would be another good read-aloud for a little bit older kids.
A wonderful novel for the season is Winter Solstice by Rosamunde Pilcher
GIFTS
What are gifts you received that might be a good idea to remember? (Two of our favorites were Lou Malnati’s pizza from Chicago and homemade Lars Bars (which my friend renamed “Laura Bars” 😍 for hiking, along with the recipes! )
Did you hear about a game that another family tried and liked that would be good to get next year? (We got and loved “It’s in the Bag”!)
2. SCHEDULE A DAY LATER
Block off a day on your calendar and label it CHRISTMAS PLANNING DAY.
You can make it whenever you want, but I’d say a day in the week before Thanksgiving would be good. I’ve marked my calendar for Saturday, November 19th. I also try to protect the Sunday, and Monday after Thanksgiving to decorate.
Then put two alerts in – one for a week before and one for two days before so it will actually happen! (I almost forgot this, and believe me, it won’t happen if I don’t have alerts in!)
On this day you’re going to answer questions and make lists and put dates on your calendar.
What do I need to say “no” to in order to say “yes” to the most meaningful things this season?
Since Christmas adds in, are there things you need to cut out in order to make room? How can you manage your expectations? This might even mean talking to your boss if there are extra things required of you at work, and asking what regular responsibilities he or she thinks can be put on hold so that you will have adequate margin.
3. SET YOURSELF UP FOR SUCCESS
On your Christmas planning day, put dates on your calendar – the big things you want to make sure happen. Include scheduling in Sabbaths. Maybe make an appointment for a pedicure if it is in your budget.
Practice saying, “Thank you so much for thinking of me, but I’m already committed and need to say ‘no’ this time.”
If you’re having trouble scheduling your own family celebration plus time with in-laws, decide what’s best for your family and then give in-laws several options to choose from that will work for you. (Someone once told me, you need to approach in-laws like you do toddlers – assure them that you love them and give them acceptable choices :))
Prayerfully hold things lightly. Remember, you’re planning so that you won’t end up being highjacked by every urgent thing that comes up, but there may be last-minute changes you need to make, or holy interruptions that deserve your attention. Commit your plans to the Lord and ask Him to confirm or help you adapt.
Lord help me to move slowly enough to experience Jesus fully and love others deeply.
Plan to practice the Examenduring Advent. To help, you can upload the Lectio 365 app. It has an Evening prayer that guides you through a review of your day, helping you to slow down and pay attention to the presence of God in your life – especially valuable in the busy Christmas season.
What ideas have you seen this year that you want to remember for next year? Share with us in the comments!
