Author: lauracrosby (Page 25 of 45)

Waiting at Gate C6, C9, E10, H5…

February 11, 2013 /

I’ve spent a lot of time in airports this past week.  And this was not a happy thing.

It’s not like I was going someplace exotic like Bora Bora, or ran into Mumford and Sons on their way to the Grammys.

With the mega snowstorm that hit plus, normal mechanical stuff, It was just a matter of multiple delayed flights where each update means a gate change and a later departure.

And so it meant sitting.

And waiting.  Hours and hours of waiting.

Years ago John and I heard a motivational speaker who, in these situations used the refrain “You can cancel my flight, but you can’t cancel my day!” 

That sounds so…positive!  So cheery.  So empowering. 

But it’s just an annoying quote when your life is about being productive and on the go and you’re sitting in an airport, missing the event you’re scheduled for, or waiting to get home and your husband texts that line to you.  Are you with me?

When your plans are upended and you feel upended like Charlie Brown, once more having the football snatched away just as he was kicking, and you’re out of control, how do you control what you can – your attitude?

I’d like to be super spiritual and tell you all the Scripture that came to mind, but here’s how it went.

First I tried the practice of thanksgiving.  I was very thankful they aborted the first take off of one of my flights half-way down the runway, throwing on the brakes when an emergency light came on.  Safety is always good in my book.

And I was thankful for the cute little girl in the terminal with the Tinkerbell peeking out of her backpack.  And then I was pretty much done with thankfulness (with apologies to Anne Voskamp :)).  Still unproductive and waiting…

Next I tried praying while unclenching my hands, letting go of my need for power and control.  Very unproductive and still waiting (but it felt like the right thing to do)

Then, I tried to see Jesus.  To be present and aware of passengers around me who I might encourage. But every head was down, every eye seemed to be glued to Iphones while mine was dead (This was not on my “things I’m thankful for” list!).

Lastly I tried to smile.  I had just heard about a new study out that shows that smiling affects your attitude, reduces stress, and increases heart health.  Sounded good to me.

I tried, but I felt kind of like a Stepford Wife, plastic and robotic.  And I think people wondered if I was a little “off” shall we say.  I was unproductive, still waiting, and my mouth muscles hurt.

In the end I bought a Chik-fil-A sandwich and a People magazine.

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I remember hearing someone say once that God wants to give us a “snow day” every week with Sabbath.  Why do we resist?  Why do we seem so addicted to “doing”… to being recognized for what we accomplish?  Is it born out of a fear that being God’s beloved child isn’t enough?

Maybe, we need to relax and remember God’s ok with unproductive.  Having Chik-fil-A and a little Sabbath at Gate C6 was not a bad thing.

How do you handle interruptions to your plans and out-of-controledness?

Draining the Daunt on Fearless Friday

February 8, 2013 /

For those of you new to this blog, you may want to read about One Word and our Fearless Fridays.

I’m flying to Chicago today to speak at a retreat for the church where I grew up, and yes, I’m a tad nervous.

Some (many?) of the women who will be there know me.  You know… in a way that can be embarrassing.  They watched me grow up and they introduced me to my husband and they were at my wedding.  They have seen a lot of awkward.  And perhaps remember some ill-advised words or jump-before-you’re-ready-moments.  This is a bit…daunting.

What’s ahead of you today that requires “undauntedness”?

What is it that helps us to walk secure into situations like these?

There’s a message that Bill Hybels preached a few years ago that I have thought about more than most and it’s been helpful in this daunting stuff.  In the message Bill talked about Hezekiah’s prayer in 2 Kings 19.

The Assyrians are coming against the Israelites.  The king of Assyria sends a letter trash-talking Hezekiah and the God he holds fast to.  Hezekiah could easily have been daunted by this super power of the ancient world, but he spreads out the threatening letter before the Lord and prays.

“Now, Lord our God, deliver us from his hand, so that all the kingdoms of the earth may know that You alone, Lord, are God.”

The key question that has rolled around in my brain as I’ve prayed ever since is, “What’s  your ‘so that’?”

Whether it’s anticipating a really hard conversation or confrontation, or a big project or a new business venture, or a physical goal, or an application… if there’s fear associated with it, it must be important to you.  Why?  What would you say?

“This is important to me so that…?”

Really?  There’s a lot of muck in our many motives.  But if our “so that” is to bring glory to God it drains the daunt out of the situation.

Because if we’ve worked as hard as we can to prepare, and laid out our situation before God, and can honestly say “I think…as best as I can tell (and I know no motives are completely pure) I want to do this well so that You will be glorified.”

Then it’s not about us.

We have nothing to lose and nothing to prove. The ball’s in God’s court. We can relax and move ahead undaunted.

It’s up to Him to add His “extra” to our “ordinary”, His “super” to His “natural”.

Because “we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us.” (2 Cor. 4:7)

How’s it going with your One Word?  I’d love to hear what you’re learning!

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You’ve? Got This!

February 6, 2013 /

We’re on vacation this week.  Hope this re-post from October of ’11 is encouraging to you!  

I’m a terrible tennis player.  Seriously terrible.

This past summer I started playing tennis.  I’ve kind of dabbled before, but back issues put any play on hold til I had surgery and now I’m good to go.  Ok, “good to go” is totally relative.  I play on a tennis team, but it’s like the “Bad News Bears” of tennis teams.  We’re the worst of the worst.

In spite of being seriously bad, I have fun and as I play matches now, I’m reminded of all the hours I spent cheering for our daughters Katy, and Maggie as they played.  One of the common refrains from spectators and fellow teammates was “You’ve got this!  You’ve got this Katy!  You’ve got this Maggie!”

The implication was “You’ve got all the skill and ability necessary to win this match.  You have it in you.”

It struck me the other day that this is what God would like to remind me of each morning…not that I’ve got this, but that HE has it.  He’s got this moment, this day, this season, my life in His hands.

He has all the power, and understanding and patience and resources for anything we face today.  He is sufficient.

And BECAUSE He’s got this, you’ve got this!

In what area of your life do you need to hear God whisper, “I’ve got this” today? Maybe it’s something specific to today, or general for this season of life.

If you want, you can post just one word or a short phrase (or a paragraph if you want!) in the comments. Work?  Relationships?  Parenting?  Health?

Here’s mine: Laura – A couple of hard conversations I anticipate today.

We can list anything and hear God say, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” 2 Cor. 12:9                                                                                             He’s got this.

One More Antidote to Being Daunted and Undone

February 4, 2013 /

I’m not sure, but I think maybe the most crushing phrase Satan can whisper in our ears is “You’re the only one.”

You’re the only one who’s ever made a mistake that bad.

The only one who hasn’t had a date in a year (or three).

The only one who didn’t get that job or didn’t get into that school or wasn’t invited…

The only one who hasn’t done something important like marching on Washington or getting published or feeding the hungry in Calcutta.

You’re the only one small enough to feel jealous or sensitive about that stupid thing. Remember?  Like that thing I confessed here on Friday.

But then God gives a gift.  The gift of friends who put their arm around us and whisper “Me too.

They say “It’s really ok.  We’re all messes.  All fixer-uppers.  And I still love you.”

The other day after my post I took a walk on the beach with my dear friend… the sun so bright, the rolling tide so steady – dancing with the sand in a frolicky way, not rough and mean like it can be some days.

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And my friend asked some gentle questions and she listened and poured grace like she was pouring me a tall glass of sparkling icy tea.  Like she always does.  And she shared a little of her own “maybe I’m the only one” stuff.

Though the exact words may not have been spoken, everything about our conversation said “Me too.” and “I still love you.”

It feels like God provides these safe friends for a glimpse of the divine.  They remind us we’re not alone.

And then, like when the surf after a storm has left a lot of junk on the beach, our friends help us sift through the broken bits and find the beauty that’s still there.  The bright pieces of sea glass and the intact sand dollar that has survived the pounding.

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So today I’m thankful for friends who say “Me too.” and “I still love you.” and “There’s still beautiful treasure in the mess.”

The Voice of Fear on Fearless Friday

February 1, 2013 /

I do not think of myself at an insecure person.  So writing these next sentences feels a little like Lance Armstrong must have felt coming clean with Oprah.  Except for the fact that I don’t have millions to lose and I’ve never won a bike race and I’m not a guy. Ok, it’s totally different, but here’s my confession.

I’ve been decidedly daunted this week.  Perfectly paralyzed. Buffeted by the winds of self-doubt and discouragement.

This seemed to come out of nowhere, but when I stopped to pray and reflect I can trace the beginnings to a Tweet.  Yep, it took just 140 insensitive characters to take me down.  “Really?”  you’re saying.  Really?

And then there was a post by someone who made me furious and jealous at the same time.

And a word here or the lack of a word there…

Holy Buckets!  Just days ago I was undaunted…bullet-proof, regardless of any spitballs that might be spat my way!  And now the spiral into the comparison trap that left me in a heap of ” Not good enough.  Not good enough.”

Ever end up there?  Maybe by a different road, but still?

Who or What is it in your life that brings up those feelings of fear or insecurity?

Recently I read this quote by Rick Warren that made me respond “Yes!”:

“Insecurity is an internal alarm that says you’re trusting in something that could be taken from you instead of [trusting in] Christ.”  

So I’ve been stewing and praying (sometimes the two look a lot alike) about how to deal with this.  It’s messy and it’s a process and it’s not easy.  Here are a few of the things I’ve been trying.

1.  Identify the voice. When you feel angry, or fearful, or jealous, or small, do you stop and think “Where is that coming from? Just who or what is really saying that to me?”  Why am I giving it such power in my life?  Why does it bring up this strong emotion in me?  Does it tap into a past wound that I need to address?

2.  Challenge the voice with the truth.  “Bring every thought captive to Christ.”  What would Jesus say in response to this narrative?   If the story in your head says anything other than that you are gifted by God, fearfully and wonderfully made, cherished by Him, created for good works that He has for you, it’s a lie and you need to tell it to shut up. (I know, easier said than done!)

3.  Manage what or who you’re allowing to get in your head.  For me this means ruthlessly putting up some boundaries.  Fasting from some social media, and un-following some people who are wonderful but bring out my worst self.  It may be totally different for you.  It might involve the people you spend time with or the shows you watch or where you go or whatever…

Why is this so important?

Because if we listen to the voice of fear and insecurity when God calls us to go, we’ll stay.

When He calls us to stay the course, we’ll run away.

When He calls us to speak, we’ll remain silent.  And I truly believe that all of our voices are valuable and needed in the kingdom.

Those are a few of my strategies.  What helps you?

P.S.  I wrote this and afterwards I saw this great image posted by John Acuff.  Happy Friday!

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For those on the Black Diamond Trail

January 28, 2013 /

Maybe you’re reading this this morning and “It’s summertime and the livin’ is easy.  Fish are jumping, and the cotton is high.  Your daddy’s rich and your mamma’s good looking.”

You’ve signed a book deal or had a baby, got engaged or or got accepted into the college of your choice.  If that’s you, we want to rejoice with you and praise God, even if it feels like a “sacrifice of praise.”

But this post isn’t so much for you. You can stop reading.

This is for the person who’s reading and it’s a bleak winter day and it feels like you’re alone on a barren icy uphill climb that is really, really hard.  And most of all, you can’t see the end of the trail.

As I write this I’m in Florida (I know, I know, ironic.  Don’t hate me), and this morning I biked to “my” Starbucks down here where I go every day, hoping to see a barista I’ve befriended over the years.  She is a remarkable young (maybe 25 year old?) woman who loves Jesus and has been very sick for most of her life.  She received one lung transplant, but it didn’t take and she is now waiting for another.

She’s on a double black diamond trail.  I’m sure she is cold and exhausted at this point. She’s been too ill to work lately, but whenever I see her I marvel at her indomitable joy and faith.

I was praying for her, and so many others on grueling paths this morning when I came across an amazing verse I’ve never noticed before.  Actually, I must have noticed it before cuz there was a note next to it, but I forgot.  Which is typical.

Anyway, in Psalm 77 the writer starts out with a  brutally honest rant (he’s a Simon Cowell pray-er of sorts), which is pretty reassuring cuz God doesn’t smite him, but lets him get it out of his system.

Then the guy takes another tack. To say not “I feel“, but “I will” remember and meditate on God’s mighty deeds.  He makes a choice to look back and recount where he’s seen God’s presence and power.

But then comes the verse that struck me powerfully in a fresh way.  Verse 19 says,

“Your path led through the sea, your way through the mighty waters, though your footprints were not seen.”

Kind of like “Wow. You were with me before, even when I couldn’t see it.  Even in the crappiest times.  Maybe, just maybe, You’re still leading.  Still with me.”

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That may seem small, but I truly think one of the things God says to us that is most comforting is “Even in this, I am with you.  You are not alone.”

Praying that God brings a little of the warmth of His presence to wintery paths today.

Fearless Friday and Refinement

January 25, 2013 /

It’s only been 3 weeks and I already want to change my One Word.                                       Maybe “change” is too strong, but “refine”?  Yeah.

My word is Fearless.  But when I say fearless I don’t mean the opposite of timid or fearful.

I mean “resolute”, “secure-enough-in-God-to-proceed”.

I think “undaunted” may be better.

Undaunted is a “nevertheless” word.  One that throws “but God…” in the face of “but what if?”

I think one of the reasons I’m so enamored with the word “undaunted” is because I recently read Christine Cain’s book by that title.

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What do Kingdom Conversations Sound Like?

January 23, 2013 /

Years ago, a wise old couple, (picture Mr. and Mrs. Yoda) – ones who have that “non-anxious presence” that is so winsome – impacted us greatly.

Every time we came away from a conversation with them we felt like our eyes, our hearts, our spirits had been lifted to something higher.  We came away feeling richer.  Sometimes inspired, sometimes challenged.  Sometimes with renewed vision.  We started referring to these as “kingdom conversations.”

They said they had learned the quality from people before them who always seemed to be able to redirect the focus of a conversation like a boomerang, away from themselves, back to the other person and the work of God.  Not in  cheesy manufactured way, but it was just part of who they were.

The other day we were with a group of young friends, discussing a new acquaintance who didn’t seem to be very good at the boomerang game.  Not a very good question-asker-listener.  Instead, this person seemed to be a little self-absorbed (like we all can be).

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Stupid Prayers?

January 21, 2013 /

I remember an acquaintance of ours once saying “So-and-so fell out of the stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down.”

Some days I think he might say that about me.

Today I was driving home from the grocery store and all of a sudden I realized that I was praying that something would “happen” so that the couple who booked the wedding photographer that Maggie and Austin want would…you know…cancel.

Now, I didn’t pray that the couple who booked him would be struck dead or break up or anything.  But still, it was kind of like I was asking the godfather to “fix” a basketball game or something.

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And then I shook myself as I turned the corner at the stoplight and thought “I’m a terrible human being!  That’s such a stupid prayer!  I should be praying for Obama, Africa, or global warming.”

Do you think “stupid” is a word in God’s vocabulary?  Is there such a thing as a “stupid prayer”?

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Fearless Friday and My Brother

January 18, 2013 /

It’s Fearless Friday in our One Word year!  Catch up and join us!

You may think you have the best family in the history of the universe, but you don’t.

I do.

I know I don’t deserve it.  I don’t recycle enough and I can be petty and selfish and I sometimes pray for things like losing weight when many are starving, and there’s a lot of other bad stuff I’m not going to tell you about.

The only thing I can attribute my family to is grace.  Period.  But there you have it.  Yes, we have our own set of crazy, but I’m still convinced my family is the best.

Anyway, now that we’ve got that straight, I want to introduce you to one of my two wonderful brothers.  I like to call him “Baby David” and he calls me “Sweet Sis” and he is one of the kindest, most godly men I know.  He’s on the right below, washing dishes at Thanksgiving with John.

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Last Friday he wrote me such an encouraging note in response to the One Word post.  He, like so many of you, will text or email, or FB message me with these incredibly rich insights that others don’t get to see unless they’re in the comment section here on the blog.  So I asked David if I could post some of the words from his email and he graciously said “yes.”  Here’s what he wrote:

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