Author: Laura Crosby (Page 4 of 54)

Soul Food Before Thanksgiving

November 13, 2021 /

For Those Who Want a Little Inspiration…

Over the past month I coached an online workshop through National Community Church, teaching people how to share their God stories – the story of how they came to know Jesus and the stories of how God has shown up in their everyday lives – showing them more bout His character.

In our tiny group, was a committed young man who joined us online at 4:30 a.m. his time each week from India! He so inspired me as he shared his story of growing up Hindu, but coming to recognize Jesus as the healer of his mom, forgiver and savior. He has little to no support other than the online faith community and yet he has such a passion for having India know Jesus. Will you pray with me for him?

Gracious Lord, we come before You on behalf of many around the world, like Kirubakaran, who are following You under such difficult circumstances. We pray that your Holy Spirit might strengthen and encourage their hearts. Help them to know that they are known, seen, loved, and valued by You. I pray that even today they might see the fruit of their perseverance. In the strong name of Jesus, Amen.

For Parents (or mentors, aunts, etc)…

I love, love, love this list of 10 Fun Things to Do at Home with Kids and I know they are good, because I did some of them back in the day of littles! Even though my kids are grown, I’d love for us to create a family time capsule over the holidays. Won’t it be interesting to look back on this season 10 years from now? (Hopefully we WILL be looking back some day!)

If you’re like me, you can read something like this and think, “Oh, what a great idea!” but not do anything about it. Maybe choose one idea (or let your kids choose one) and commit to do it this week. Make a memory!

For Leaders…

If you’re a leader, a coach, a teacher…basically anyone who works with volunteers, take a look at these great questions your volunteers are asking.

For Those With Wanderlust…

Those who know me, know I need no extra motivation to travel, but I was captivated by this list of 18 Movies that Inspire Travel and am putting several on my list to watch asap!

So thankful I was able to visit D.C. IRL this week!

For Hosts…

A Hosting Game-Changer from Priya Parker – assign your guests roles. People like to help!

In social gatherings, hosts can also carry too much weight (in part because we want people to relax and have fun.) But guess what? These roles can actually be fun, playful, and deeply simple. It could be, as my friend Nora Abousteit does, that you assign a “Water Minister” and a “Wine Minister” to be in charge of refilling glasses and making sure everyone has enough to drink.

Priya parker

You might also like my Instagram post with recipe here!

For Nesters

You’ve heard of a “capsule wardrobe”, right? Well what about a “Decor Capsule Wardrobe”? I thought this was a great idea!

For Those Who Want a Book Suggestion…

This was a really good mystery, and I just read that Jennifer Garner has signed to play the lead in the limited series based on the book!

That’s it from me except for one last question…

Who is team “decorate for Christmas before Thanksgiving”, and who is waiting to spring into action Friday, November 26th?

Dear Friends Wounded by the Church,

October 16, 2021 /

Many of you know that my husband and I have been serving temporarily in a church that has experienced extreme pain and a break in trust. They are a church of Jesus-following people who are prayerfully doing their best to acknowledge mistakes, and seek healing. This week was another step in that process. I thought it might be a good time to repost this from years ago.

Dear Friends wounded by the Church,

As I write this, each of your faces come to mind and tears fill my eyes.  For you.

And for me.  Because I am one of you.

Maybe it’s because I am that you’ve felt safe to share your pain with me.

You’ve experienced exclusion,

poorly handled conflict,

shaming,

power struggles,

dishonesty,

truth-telling with out grace or hope of redemption

from a church you’ve loved.

From a church I’m sure would say is trying to do its best.

But I think of the particular circumstances each of you have endured at the hands of people who say they love Jesus, and mostly I just can’t believe it and I want to rail at the injustice and shake “someone” and make it right, and undo the pain.  But instead, maybe I could tell you a story.

Last summer when I was on a bike ride through my neighborhood on a beautiful warm breezy day, my shoelace got tangled in the gears of my bike. I swerved and was stuck and took a wicked bad fall, gashing my knee gruesomely and dripping blood everywhere leaving quite a trail of evidence for the CSI folks should they choose to investigate.  It felt scary and unexpected and I felt out-of-control.

To add to my humiliation, a bunch of my friends, men, women, and children, were out in their front yard and witnessed the whole awkward debacle.  And I couldn’t even get up because my shoelace was still tightly tethering me to my gears.  The whole group of them ran over to me all concerned, and one of them ran back to get a wet towel and a super-hero bandaid which was so sweet.

For days and weeks and months, that wound was tender and though it scabbed over, it got easily bumped and would start bleeding all over again.  I’d experience set-backs in the healing process and I learned to not be around the people who would carelessly stumble into me and my fragile wound.  Instead, for awhile, I needed to choose gentle friends and counselors who loved me and would be patient with my ugly scab and listen to the story of how it happened.

It was some of those same people who, as I began to heal, were able to help me ask about my choices in the situation, and where God was, and what He might be teaching me.  In the process I realized that my fists were clenched a lot – clenched in determination to fix things quickly.  And they helped me to unclench my hands and patiently trust Jesus to do His work.

I believe we get better if we want to.  But today, I still have a very noticeable scar that will probably never disappear.   This scar is my reminder to be careful, wear my helmet, and try to be gentle with other riders.  Oh, and tie my shoes more tightly.

The other day, a friend who’s recently been hurt and disillusioned by the church said, “I don’t see how you have hope and why you keep showing up.”  The church does, often, make me sad, but it’s not the church I trust in.  It’s Jesus.

To my many friends who, like me, have been wounded by the church I would say don’t give up on Her.  Because Jesus hasn’t given up on Her.  Or you.  Or me.  And we are the church.

Speak the truth.  Be gentle.  Look for Jesus.  Admit your own brokenness.  Forgive.  But don’t give up.

For whatever reason, Jesus has said the Church is His Plan A for loving the world.

Ahh but we’re a messed up bunch, aren’t we all?  So it’s a good thing that included in Plan A is  the cross and forgiveness for all of us.

Have you been wounded by the church?  What has God used to help you heal?

One Practice to Bring Peace to Your Out-of-Control World

October 14, 2021 /

Before 2020 the yearly average number of investigated incidents with unruly passengers on airlines was 143.

In 2021, just since January 1st, there have been 3,715 reports of unruly passengers investigated.

As a friend of ours says, “All the fuzz has worn off.”

We’re raw, easily bumped and bruised and offended.

Because we have all been dealing with so much, we are less likely to feel we have the capacity to extend grace, to expect the best, to submit to others for the greater good.

I think our angry, anxious, defensive posture may be rooted in an underlying feeling of not being safe – so much is out of our control.

I’m with you. This has been an incredibly stressful week. I find myself going back over and over to a practice that helps me. Maybe it will help you too.

First, close your eyes and breathe deeply.

Imagine that you are standing next to a wide, rushing mountain stream, filled with boulders.

You hop from rock to rock until you get to the middle of the stream where there is a huge boulder that has a shallow smooth dip in it, almost like a seat has been carved out for you.

You sit on the boulder watching the water rushing by on all sides.

The rapids represent all the circumstances that threaten to overwhelm you, carry you away, pull you under. But you are safe and secure on the rock.

As you rest there, secure, when worries come to mind, you release them into the water and let it carry them away for now.

You remind yourself of this.

Find rest my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from Him.

Truly He is my rock and my salvation; He is my fortress, I will not be shaken.

My salvation and my honor depend on God; He is my mighty rock, my refuge.

Trust in Him at all times, you people; pour out your hearts to Him, for God is our refuge.

Psalm 62:5-8

There is something settling, reassuring to me about the boulder I choose to sit on over and over through my day. Are there practices that are helpful to you in this stressful season?

Soul Food for those Who Love Fall

October 8, 2021 /

We’re living temporarily in California, so Fall is…different, but we’re still trying to do some of our traditions, like making first-day-of-school chicken pot pie, watching Brian’s Song, and making lots of apple-y and pumpkin-y things. Here are a few fun links from this week!

I don’t know if I’ll get a chance to make these this year, but aren’t they adorable and so easy!??

From Instagram this week – book recs and hospitality how-to’s.

A couple of books I’m reading
A fun extra if you have time.

Ohmygosh! I just finished reading My Life in France by Julia Child and then saw this – You Can Spend the Night – and Cook up a Storm – at Julia Child’s Charming French Cottage. Can you EVEN??

If you’re a parent, a great new resource I’ve found is called The Parent Cue. Here is a resource on teaching your kids about gossip that I thought was good!

Lastly, the easiest pumpkin recipe that is better than pumpkin pie! Sorry, I didn’t take a picture when I made these yesterday!

Pumpkin Pie Dessert Squares

Crust:

  • 1 Package yellow cake mix (SAVE 1 CUP of dry mix – I always forget this part)
  • 1/2 cup butter melted
  • 1 egg

Mix and pat on bottom of greased 9×13 pan.

Filling: Mix 3 cups (1 lb. 14 oz can) pumpkin pie mix (not plain pumpkin), 2 eggs, and 2/3 cup evaporated milk. Pour over crust.

Topping: cut together 1 ts. cinnamon, 1/4 cup sugar, and 1/4 cup butter. Crumble over filling and bake at 350 for 45-50 minutes.

That’s it for me! What wonderful fall things are you doing or finding! Leave a comment!

Soul Food When You’re Weary

September 10, 2021 /

Gosh we’re tired, aren’t we?

Yes, Covid is serious, and we have serious differences over protocols, and there’s a lot else in the world that seems more defeating than ever. We need to pay attention, to do the work of mourning and mending.

But we also need to take a break, to get outside and look up, bake something yummy, take a nap, laugh out loud, celebrate the everyday graces of God.

I hope that one of the following will make you smile or lift your spirits.

Have we ever said “pivot” more times in a year? We’re all in this together!

When you’re having a bad day, be gentle with yourself.

When you have a little bandwidth, consider blessing someone else with a care package or note of encouragement.

This arrived from daughter Katy who knows I love fall and baking. The book, “My Life in France” is just delightful, and I think of Katy every time I use the spatula – see recipes below 🙂

This soup and bread arrived when my husband had surgery recently, and the card below came on the exact date I was speaking about Moses to the staff here at church.

One of my favorite Instagram feeds to follow is Kelle Hampton (aka ETST – Enjoying the small things) From her I got the idea of creating a “You’ve Got Mail” care package. It’s been so fun to assemble!

  • A fall candle from The Grace Effect CALLED “Shop Around the Corner“! I ordered one and loved the scent to much I ordered two more!
  • A Starbucks gift card (for a Tall Decaf Cappuccino)
  • A bouquet of freshly sharpened pencils
  • A copy of The Skating Shoes
  • Daisy seeds (because “They’re the friendliest flower”)
  • Twinkle lights (because, duh, who doesn’t need more twinkle lights?)
  • A couple of “You’ve Got Mail” postcards and stickers
  • A pumpkin and a “Be Brave” sign from Target

If you want a fun “You’ve Got Mail” movie night, check out this post.

Another idea I got from Kelle are these realistic looking candles with remote control and timer!

In an attempt to bring Fall to California, I’ve been baking fallish things like

THE BEST ZUCCHINI BREAD EVER. (Note: I said best, not healthiest)

  • 2 cups sugar
  • 3 cups flour
  • 1 tsp. salt
  • 1 tsp. soda
  • 1 tsp. each: cinnamon, nutmeg, ground cloves
  • 1/4 tsp. baking powder
  • 3 eggs
  • 1 cup oil
  • 2 cups shredded zucchini (if large, remove seeds first)
  • 3 tsp. vanilla
  • 1/2 cup milk

Grease 2 8 or 9″ loaf pans.

Mix eggs, oil, milk, and vanilla.

Blend in dry ingredients, then stir in zucchini.

Bake about 45-50 minutes @350. Cool 10 minutes in pan, then remove.

Come say hi over on Instagram?

Every day we pray this for our kids – that they would recognize some simple or dramatic evidence of God’s character displayed in their life before they go to sleep at night.

• Strength supplied in moments of weakness
• A text of encouragement
• A Scripture verse coming to mind at just the right time
• A sunset or seeing the power of creation
• A friend asking forgiveness

We want them to see Him just as we want that for ourselves.

How are you praying for your kids, your students, your nieces and nephews?

Share what you’re doing that’s bringing you joy or what others have done in the comments! If you get this in email, just click on the title and scroll down to the bottom. If you’re commenting for the first time, don’t worry if it doesn’t show up right away…it will!

4 Things to Consider When Friends Love Jesus, but Don’t Agree With You

August 24, 2021 /

It was a gorgeous summer morning in Minneapolis and I decided to get in an early bike ride before it was too hot. If you haven’t had the privilege of visiting here, let me say that we have lakes. Lots of them. AND we have more dedicated bike trails than any other city in the U. S.

The lake I was riding around has a oneway bike trail which I had been following, but detoured along a street away from the lake. To get back to where I needed to go was complicated. The street was very narrow with no gutter so I didn’t feel comfortable there and veered up onto an empty sidewalk (not the bike trail because I was going the wrong way) thinking I could just ride a few feet to get back where I needed to be.

“IT’S ILLEGAL TO RIDE ON THE SIDEWALK!” yelled a man walking a dog (who was not on the sidewalk where I was). “IT’S ILLEGAL TO RIDE ON THE SIDEWALK!” he yelled again.

You know what I did? I started crying. (ok, I just got really teary, but still…)

“Why are you telling this ridiculous sidewalk story?” you may be asking.

That’s why. In this season when everyone seems to be offended by everything, we need more compassionate curiosity than self-righteous judgment.

Sidewalk biking is a small thing, but all of us are dealing with much bigger issues, like Covid vaccinations and masking, where we’re tempted to feel self-righteous and judgmental.

This. Is. So. Hard. When people who love Jesus come to different conclusions about the best course of action, how do we handle it?

I am unapologetically in favor of getting vaccinated for Covid and masking where called for. I am guided by the biblical mandate to love others by protecting the most vulnerable, prioritizing the common good over my individual rights or desires, and stewarding the medical resources God has graciously given us.

But I’ve been in conversations with friends and family who don’t agree with me. They have a variety of reasons for coming to different conclusions. So, unlike the stranger yelling at me on the sidewalk, how can we navigate the dynamics of these relationships in ways that honor God and others made in His image?

1. Acknowledge that we are all “Extra Grace Required” (EGR) people in this season.

We have been through a lot. We’re carrying the losses of the past year and a half, like a wounded soldier with PTSD carrying his buddy out of a combat zone. We’re wary and defensive. We need people to be gentle with us, as we need to be gentle with them. We’re all doing our best.

2. Prioritize a posture of compassionate curiosity.

When we look at Jesus, He asked questions much of the time (and He really DID know all of the right answers!). When we have the humility to be genuinely interested in what has informed someone’s decisions, we may still not come to agree with them, but we may come to a place of greater respect or understanding of a different point of view. If we want people to listen to us, we need to listen to them.

Questions open dialog and make influence possible. Consider asking:

  • Could you help me understand what led you to your position on this?
  • It’s clear you have a lot of emotion around this issue. What have you experienced that triggers this intensity?
  • What would you like me to know that I may misunderstand?
  • Are you open to hearing how I came to my position on this?

3. Look for common ground.

My brother and I disagree about getting vaccinated, and have different standards for masking. Earlier this summer I talked to him in person to try to better understand his position. Before we talked, he prayed for us, a reminder that the most important thing we have in common is a love for Jesus and each other.

We need to affirm each other’s willingness to have hard conversations, to show up, to be vulnerable.

Coming away from our conversation, I still don’t agree with his stance, but I better understand. I also better understand the relational pain he’s experienced in our family as a result of his choices and the way we’ve communicated.

4. Have good boundaries.

All this said, Covid is a life and death issue and our choices have worldwide consequences. I firmly believe that Jesus would have us pursue the qualities listed above, balancing grace and truth, but there are also times when we need to draw a line and say that it may not be healthy for us to continue to talk about this, or spend time together.

You might end up saying, “I’m sorry, but I will not spend time indoors with you because the choices you’re making feel unsafe, but I’d be happy to meet you outdoors. I love you and I want to find ways to prioritize our ongoing relationship.”

“Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a worker who does not need to be ashamed and who correctly handles the word of truth. Avoid godless chatter, because those who indulge in it will become more and more ungodly.” 

2 Timothy 2:15-16

I am the first to say, “I really struggle with this and get it wrong so often!” I offer these thoughts as a fellow traveler, acknowledging we’re all doing our best (even mean yelling dog-walker guy who may have had sidewalk trauma in his past 🙂

I don’t think this is the best place to debate the issue of vaccines, but I would love to hear of your experience discussing hard issues and what you’ve learned in the comments.

If you receive this in email, just click on the title and scroll down to leave a comment. If this is your first or second time commenting, I have to approve it, so don’t lose heart if you don’t see it immediately.

Soul Food for Weeks When the World Seems to be Spinning Out of Control

August 19, 2021 /

As I sit in Starbucks writing this, the world is still rotating on its axis, but the spin feels more like an unpredictable cyclone – whirling debris that keeps changing direction and every time we think it’s going to run out of energy it amps up again.

You don’t need me to name all the things. There’s the global suffering and division we are horrified at and want to help alleviate. But you also have your own personal hard stuff that is unique to you, and….just…life. We’re tempted to say “Oh…first world problems.” and that’s true, but your hard is hard too.

How much do we camp in the pain – our own or others’? How do we pray? How do we keep perspective? Can we be thankful, but also honest about the loss we don’t understand?

On Fridays I often try to offer some resources I’ve found that have been helpful or encouraging to me. I hope you’ll find some nugget here to equip or refresh you.

As we grapple with death and destruction around the world and pray, I found these two suggestions from Danielle Macauley and Katie Racine really helpful. Prayer isn’t the only thing we can do, but it’s one thing.

I listen to podcasts at 1.5 speed, but I went back and listened a second time to this one to take notes!

Ohmygosh! This is such a great sermon, especially if you struggle with comparison (and who doesn’t?)

Are you single, or have single friends you love? You will resonate with this podcast!

I LOVE to-do lists, but yes, they can get overwhelming. If you read this simple post linked below, be sure to read the comments too because there are some great additional ideas there!

I’m always nervous when I recommend books, because everyone has such different taste. It’s great when you find someone you can trust to consistently endorse reads you will like. Holly Furtick is one of those people for me.

One Two Three is a terrific book with fascinating, quirky characters who suck you into their world.

One Two Three

Lastly, as fall approaches, a recipe for all the zucchini people will hopefully be giving you from their garden. It’s The World’s BEST Zucchini Bread Recipe! (note: I did NOT say the “healthiest” :))

Makes 2 loaves

  • 2 cups sugar
  • 3 cups flour
  • 1 tsp. salt
  • 1 tsp. baking soda
  • 1 tsp each – cinnamon, nutmeg, ground cloves
  • 1/4 tsp. baking powder
  • 3 eggs
  • 1 cup oil
  • 3 tsp. vanilla
  • 1/2 cup milk
  • 2 cups shredded zucchini (if large, remove seeds first)

Grease 2 8″ or 9″ loaf pans.

Mix eggs, oil, milk, and vanilla

Blend in dry ingredients, then stir in zucchini.

Bake about 45-50 minutes or until toothpick comes out clean. Cool 10 minutes in pan, then remove.

That’s it for me! I’d love to hear from you in the comments! What are your “finds”, insights, or things you’re thankful for this week?

If you get this as an email, just click on the title and scroll down to leave a comment.

3 Practices to Help You Navigate Changing Seasons

August 16, 2021 /

I glimpse a small patch of bright fire red in the middle of still-green maple leaves as I bike through my neighborhood to Starbucks early in the morning, greeting dog-walkers and porch sitters with their first cup of coffee. Cardinals chirp and I imagine they are discussing plans to head south.

It’s not cold yet, but there’s a change in the air. The mornings are cooler and soon it will take all day for the sun to warm the earth, barely struggling up to the high, like a middle school boy trying to do chin-ups, then sliding quickly back down.

Yellow buses lumber through the neighborhood doing practice runs and we notice that dusk tiptoes in earlier. I smile at “bouquets of freshly sharpened pencils”. I want to light candles, make soup, bake muffins. Things are changing.

Whether you’re back to packing lunches and driving carpools, adjusting to a new baby in your home, or anticipating a change in employment, moving to a new city, or trying to accept a “new normal” without a loved-one, Fall marks a season of change. And even good change can be hard.

I’ve enjoyed a glorious summer at home in Minnesota. This week I need to head back to California where my husband has an interim pastoral position. I’m so thankful for home and summer, but I’m also thankful I’ll be reunited with John and our west-coast daughter and son-in-law.

I look forward, “adventurously expectant” (Romans 8:15 MSG) to what God has next, but still… It’s got me reflecting on how to “choose life”(Deuteronomy 13:19) while also in the midst of the grieving that inevitably comes with change.

Here are three practices I’m engaging in:

1. Honor Traditions

In seasons of change, traditions are comforting and reassuring.  Throughout Scripture God institutes festivals and celebrations that are woven into the rhythm of the year to help us remember His faithfulness.

One of our traditions through the years as our daughters were growing up, was a “first day of school dinner” to which we invited two single friends on staff to join our family. They are like surrogate aunties for our girls. We always had homemade chicken pot pie and share “first day” highlights with laughter and thanksgiving.

What traditions can you continue to embrace (or even create) during a season of change?

2. Reflect on Relationships

Change in location or circumstances often means change in relationships. Some people you’ve seen regularly will seemingly vanish from your everyday life.

Transition is a good time to do a relational Examen. Reflect on the people in your life.

  • Are there any relationships where there might be unresolved issues?
  • Who are the friends that remain steadfast through changing seasons? How do you continue to nurture those relationships? 
  • Are there places where God is prompting you to reach out and make new friends?

Recently, God convicted me that there was a past relationship where I hadn’t sufficiently checked in to make sure there wasn’t unspoken pain. I felt like maybe I hadn’t adequately cared for this person in her time of transition, so I set up a coffee to ask how she felt. Is there someone you’ve been too busy to see in this new season? Might they be hurt?

3. Focus on the unchanging character of God

What are the attributes of God, the glimpses of grace and goodness you can call out each day as a counter-weight to the circumstances which may feel out of control or stressful in seasons of change?

If you have kids, can you share “God-sightings” around the dinner table?

Or journal about them? Or have a texting agreement with a friend – each of you texting how you remember God’s attributes each day?

The plans of the Lord stand firm forever, the purposes of his heart through all generations.

psalm 33:11

Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness

lamentations 3:22-23

So, those are my thoughts on what helps when change seems to throw me a loop. Maybe just pick one to focus on each day this week.

And what ideas would YOU share? If you receive this in email, just click on the title at the top and it will take you to the host site where you can leave a comment.

And…Just for a fun bonus, here’s the chicken pot pie recipe I use. Maybe consider making it and inviting some new friends over!

Crust

1 box Pillsbury refrigerated pie crusts, softened as directed on box

Filling

1/3 cup butter

1/3 cup chopped onion

1/3 cup all-purpose flour

1/2 teaspoon salt

1/4 teaspoon pepper

1 3/4 cups chicken broth (from 32-oz carton)

1/2 cup whole milk

2 1/2 cups shredded cooked chicken (I splurge on rotisserie chicken already deboned)

2 cups frozen mixed vegetables, thawed

** I usually cut down on either the broth or the milk, and I add about a Tablespoon of “Better than Boullion organic chicken base” Can also add sautéed mushrooms.   Steps

  • 1 Heat oven to 425°F. Make pie crusts as directed on box for Two-Crust Pie using 9-inch glass pie pan. (I pre-cook the bottom crust for about 10 minutes so it doesn’t get soggy with the filling)
  • 2 In 2-quart saucepan, melt butter over medium heat. Add onion; cook 2 minutes, stirring frequently, until tender. Stir in flour, salt and pepper until well blended. Gradually stir in broth and milk, cooking and stirring until bubbly and thickened.
  • 3 Stir in chicken and mixed vegetables. Remove from heat. Spoon chicken mixture into crust-lined pan. Top with second crust; seal edge and flute. Cut slits in several places in top crust.
  • 4 Bake 30 to 40 minutes or until crust is golden brown. During last 15 to 20 minutes of baking, cover crust edge with strips of foil to prevent excessive browning. Let stand 5 minutes before serving.

Choosing Life in the Midst of Death

July 17, 2021 /

Today is the 6 year anniversary of the last day we shared with my precious brother on this earth. He died too young and we miss him terribly. I share this repost in the hopes that it will encourage those of you, in particular, who have dealt with loss this year.

IMG_0638

Dear Baby David,

It’s a lilac-blooming, cut-grass wafting, bike-riding spring season here. Life is bursting out everywhere.

Today is your birthday. It’s also Mother’s Day – a cruel irony for Mom.

A year ago you were in the midst of the fight for your earthly life. And then in two months it was over.

You’ve been gone from our sight since July 18th, but you continue to show up when I see a mischievous grin, or an arms-open-wide welcome, the painting of a fly-fisherman, a dad playing ball with his kids, a question that is asked in order to take a faith conversation beyond the surface…

It’s still hard to comprehend that you are not physically here with us. As the year progresses, we link arms as a family, stumbling together through the holidays and everydays. The thing we share is our steadfast love of you and each other. But we each grieve and process in different ways. We’re trying to listen deeply to each other.

I think when someone we crazy-love dies (husband, dad, brother, son) the biggest challenge is continuing to choose Life.

First of all, we just. don’t. WANT. to. We want to wake up and have you grilling on the patio like you should be. We don’t want to let you go – as if we could, by sheer will pull you back in like a kite that has been taken out of sight by the wind.

Also, it feels somehow that letting go and envisioning a new life without you in it is wrong…a betrayal. Like doing that somehow negates our love and devotion to you…How can we possibly continue without a vital, beloved piece of our lives?

But here’s the thing that helps me. In the everyday ordinary stuff and even as you were dying, you chose Life.

design

You chose Life first and foremost because you chose Jesus, affirming that He loves and forgives us, and as you always said, “He’s the good Author of our story.”

And then you chose life by seeing the image of Jesus in others, and serving those who felt like their life was over, and by laughing easily at yourself, and by your delight in His creation.

So we continue to choose Life even in the midst of death.

Susan is both devastated and courageous.

The tension between acceptance and the temptation to be stuck wallowing forever is real, but she has taken monumental steps in choosing Life.

She can be brave because you affirmed every day that she is capable of doing hard things. You would be so proud of her just as we are.

  • She does the hard dance of stretching herself, but knows when she needs to withdraw and rest with Jesus.
  • Her faith remains authentic and vibrant, but she hasn’t been able to go back to church without you and she knows that’s ok in this season.
  • She goes back into cancer wards with Sophia the wonder dog to bring comfort in painful situations she is all too familiar with.
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  • She organized Team Dave Strong and Courageous to raise money for Melanoma research.
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  • She is painting the downstairs a lighter color to lighten her mood.
  • She put together the Dave Johansen Memorial Leadership Lending Library at your office, so you are continuing to mentor others even in your absence.
  • She seeks grief support and community, but isn’t afraid to say what is helpful and what isn’t, what’s too soon, what’s uncomfortable, and what works. She recently has connected with a group of young widows started by another person YOU influenced with your life.
  • And she continues to seek glimpses of the Eternal. This was what she posted yesterday.
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Loss hurts, but love wins when we continue to choose Life. You probably already know all this, but we’re trying down here. We’re really trying.

love,

Your “Sweet sis”

Three Unusual Disciplines for a Refreshing Post-Covid Summer

June 17, 2021 /

This morning I met a young mom for breakfast at Turtle Bread, one of my favorites in the shady Linden Hills neighborhood near my house. Over slices of quiche we talked about race and faith communities, the unique differences in our kids, and what post-Covid life looks and feels like.

When I asked how I could be praying for her, she said, “I’m weary and burnt out from a year of pandemic and I find it hard to concentrate on spiritual disciplines. I want to connect with Jesus, but I can’t seem to focus. I also long to redeem the summer we lost last year with our kids.”

I hear the same words of fatigue and almost PTSD-type symptoms from many people I talk to! There is a tension between the exhaustion we feel and the drive to get out there amp everything up to “normal” again.

Have you ever noticed how many commands there are to celebrate, wonder, and rest (or Sabbath) in the Bible?

What if we take a sabbatical from some of the traditional spiritual disciplines and embrace the disciplines of rest and play and wonder?

These disciplines may mean we turn off the news, the computer, the TV, the podcast and show up completely present to God and others. Dive in. Breathe deep.

He performs wonders that cannot be fathomed, miracles that cannot be counted….stop and consider God’s wonders.

Job 9:10, 37:14

What if we…

  • practice joy with dance parties, and slumber parties and picnics, recognizing God’s faithfulness?
  • read a verse together and then nap with our kids on blankets out under a tree?
  • take a walk without any noise in our ears and say, “Come Holy Spirit. What do you have to show me about myself and yourself today?” (this one’s my favorite!)
  • stop to soak up God’s creation as we pick strawberries, or gather a bouquet of flowers, or look up at the clouds ?
  • carry a breath prayer with us through our days Breathe in: Creator God, Breathe out: Refresh me.

Recently my small group took time to celebrate all God’s gifts that we had missed rejoicing over while separated by Covid.

What will you do to celebrate, wonder, or rest this summer?

Many, Lord my God, are the wonders you have done, the things you planned for us. None can compare with you; were I to speak and tell of your deeds, they would be too many to declare.

Psalm 40:5
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