In these days of social media, it’s tempting to see ourselves like the prophet Elijah, self-righteously calling down “fire” in public forums on anyone who we judge to be an enemy of God and His kingdom (or anyone who disagrees with us). Absolutely, God calls us to speak out against evil, but He shows us other ways to be effective in bringing about change also. Wednesday we looked at Abigail. Today there are two more women to pay attention to.
Happy Friday Friends! Hope it’s been a good week for you! Husband John has been out of town so it’s been quiet around here. As an extrovert I’ve been striking up conversations with any stranger I meet. If you have a cute dog, or a baby, or basically are breathing and glance my way, watch out! Hope you enjoy the soul food buffet this weekend.
“’Do not conform’ is difficult advice in a generation when crowd pressures have unconsciously conditioned our minds and feet to move to the rhythmic drumbeat of the status quo.” Martin Luther King Jr.
HOLY BUCKETS it’s a minefield out there isn’t it? More and more we are forced to face what it means to interact with both grace and truth in a vitriolic society, what it means to not be conformed to our culture, but live out the way of Jesus.
It seems like people are just looking for a reason to be offended. We pray for discernment and we ask questions like:
“Both secularism and devout faith are growing. What’s going away is the mushy middle of religiosity.” Tim Keller
Recently I was reading two accounts in the Bible where three women modeled different approaches to conflict and evil that we might learn from. I thought I’d unpack one today and two tomorrow giving possible contemporary parallels for us.
Have you guys chosen One Word this year? I know it’s halfway through January and I’m late to the party, but give me a break…It’s been, well…complicated.
First, I asked my family members what word they would choose for me. Big mistake. I asked so I needed to listen, but not only did I get a bit of variety, but they weren’t words like “joy” or “adventure” – you know, the kind I wanted to hear. Ahem. My daughters gave me “perseverance”, and “patience”. REALLY?? That’s the last time I play THIS game!
Next, I prayed and reflected, but the word the Lord seemed to impress on me was also not one I was crazy about.
BO-RING! Right?
It made sense because I’ve been working hard on some different things and I need to not lose sight of the eternal purpose of each, but I thought (again), “REALLY? Blah.” So I tried to think of more exciting alternatives that wouldn’t violate the intent, but I came up empty.
And then the Lord did that thing where He kind of freaks me out. I could almost see Him rolling His eyes, saying “This daughter of mine is a little slow. I’d better connect the dots for her.”
Here are a few of the verses He put in front of me to stumble over…
But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Galatians 5:22-23
You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you so that you might go and bear fruit—fruit that will last—and so that whatever you ask in my name the Father will give you. John 15:16
For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, mutual affection; and to mutual affection, love. 2 Peter 1:5-7
Maybe part of the fruit He wants to produce in me is patience and perseverance?
But there’s more.
My husband, John, (before I ever landed on “fruit”) said, “I’m not sure which one word it would be, but I want you to be able to celebrate the fruit God is already producing through you and enjoy it.”
Soooo maybe God uses a village? If you’ve chosen One Word for the year, what is it and what led you to choose it? If you’re commenting for the first time, don’t freak when it doesn’t show up immediately (it will, soon)
If you don’t have One Word yet, consider praying and asking your family.
P.S. This isn’t about working harder…not about doing more. It’s about paying attention and cooperating with the work God desires to do in your life to make you more like Him.
Hey Friends!
How many of you are feeling like you need a nap after all the busyness of December? Maybe you agree with the quote I read recently that said “January is like the Monday of months.”
Regardless of how you’re feeling, I’m so grateful you are showing up here! I pray you will find encouragement and joy in this community!
You may be reading this in flip-flops from an area of the world that is balmy right now and I’m sooooo happy for you (eye roll), but for most of us (especially those of us in MN who have seventy billion more months of winter before we see color again) I thought we could bond around some winter warm-up prompts. Wherever you are, join in!
Sweaty but eager, we gather around our tennis coach after a drill. In wrapping up, he reminds us of something he says often about “winning”. “Instead of worrying about whether you’re winning, you need to just stay in the present point. You need to detach from the outcome.”
Immediately one of the other moms on the team says, “That’s what I do with my kids!”
Does that mean she doesn’t care if her kids are convicts or racists or just neglect to say “thank you”? Not at all! It just means that she knows she can only be responsible for her part.
When they’re little that includes coaching and consequences, time-outs and training.
And prayer. Lots of prayer.
I have a mentor friend who used to tell her kids, “I have you basically for 18 years and I’m going to steward that time as wisely and prayerfully as I can.” Does that mean when they turned 18 she tore up her “mom card” and said “Phew, I’m done!”? Absolutely not. She continues to pray, trusting God to get her kids where they need to go.
Another friend has a grown daughter with issues. She kept rescuing her daughter from the consequences of her bad choices as an adult until she had a “Detach from the outcome” moment. She realized her actions were driven by what others might think of her as a parent if they saw her daughter’s destructive behavior. She opened her hands and acknowledged that her daughter was differentiated from her – an adult, responsible for her own choices. Again, that didn’t mean she stopped loving and praying fervently for her daughter. It meant she clarified what was her job, and what was her daughter’s job.
But the other day I was talking to one of my closest friends about a family member we’ve prayed for for 15 years without seeing the fruit we have begged God for. WHY Lord?
I wonder…What might it have been like for the father in the parable of the prodigal son?
How long was the son gone? How long did the dad pray?
Did he go over in his mind all the mistakes he had made as a parent? The times when he lost his temper? The times they skipped family devotions? That time he was too busy to play catch? Did he struggle to trust God to forgive and redeem his parental shortcomings?
Did he pray, somedays feeling like it was hopeless – like his son would never come to his senses?
He let his son go. He let him experience the consequences of his actions. Did he fight the urge every day to run to the “far country” and rescue him?
Did he struggle to know what his part was and what God’s part was? What the parable says is that he kept waiting and watching.
“When he was still a long way off, his father saw him. His heart pounding, he ran out, embraced him, and kissed him.” Luke 15:20
How can you be a perfect parent? You admit you’re not, and you embrace your job to pray and wait and watch, trusting the only One who is.
God, the one and only—
I’ll wait as long as he says.
Everything I hope for comes from him,
so why not?
He’s solid rock under my feet,
breathing room for my soul… Psalm 62:5-6
The other day I wanted to throw something. Or have a pity party that would involve eating lots of Patticake (from YUM!) with Cookie Dough ice cream.
And I couldn’t figure out why.
Until the late afternoon when it hit me. I was cranky because I felt out of control.
Can you relate? Maybe just a little bit?
You’ve had days like this when you were planning an outside activity and it’s minus seventy billion degrees,
and a friend who’s made a commitment to be somewhere backs out,
and a kid gets sick, and that thing that was promised is late,
and people don’t realize how lucky they are to have you around.
Big stuff and little stuff can throw us.
A lost job.
A freak accident.
Public criticism
Bottom line? You feel powerless and you feel like you’re living a Plan B life, and you don’t like it.
Not one bit.
It feels like everyone else in the universe has power and they’re using it to wreck your day. Can I get an “Amen!”?
But what if…
A friend of mine returns after a holiday visit with her in-laws. The relationship with her mother-in-law has been rough as a pot-hole-filled Minneapolis winter road from the start. Different interests, different expectations for the relationship, different cultures, different education…all of these are factors that leave these two both feeling like they are walking through a minefield whenever they are together.
They each go into time together armored up…wary. Over time, they have come to anticipate detonation rather than delight. The other becomes freeze-framed as a caricature of their worst self…
“She is so ____________”
“Why is she so sensitive about _________________”
“I always have to __________________.”
Whether an in-law, or colleague or friendship that has soured, most of us have a relationship like this in our lives. I do. And as I have been reflecting on my friend with the in-law, and me with a difficult friendship, this is where the Lord has led me.
Humility promotes healing.
To improve a strained relationship we need to remove our armor, examine our own failings, and offer two authentic words.
Those of you who subscribe to this blog know that it is my heart to create environments and resources that help us draw closer to Jesus and others. Often that sounds really good, but living it out? Ahh that’s the tough part!
Someone recently said that January is like the “Monday” of months. It may include the excitement of fresh starts, but also the “Ugh, it’s back to work…” Boy I hear that!
This morning I opened an email from a friend that included this poem.
If you’re like me, you read this and say, “YES! AMEN to that!” It sounds so right, so noble, so inspiring.
But then we ask, “But how? Little ol’ me? How am I going to do that?”
Yes, God may call us to BIG, DRAMATIC actions in order to achieve the work of Christmas and I want to be ready and willing for that.
But for most of us,
Big or small, may we be open to doing the work of Christmas every day.
Ok, can we all just agree that we’re kind of happy to see 2017 go?
We’re hoping 2018 will be a kinder, gentler, more high-minded year. We’d like to expect better of ourselves and others. We’d like to read more stories of honesty, integrity, and service. Grace and truth in equal measure.
My prayer is that Love will be the loudest voice we’ll hear.
We don’t want to live in denial of the challenges, but just for today, I thought maybe a little inspiration, a few laughs and joy were in order.
Want a great, feel-good movie? We went to see The Greatest Showman and loved it!! Downloading the soundtrack.
And for a laugh…Some of the best text conversations of the year:
Smile.
An oldie, but such a goodie!! A-MAZING!
Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press ontoward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. Philippians 3:13-14
Here’s to 2018!
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