“We’ve just been so CRAZY busy!”
I have a friend whose emails contain this phrase along with profuse apologies about her perpetual stress level almost every single time she writes me.
Sometimes I want to shout at the computer “Well STOP DOING so much!”
Brene Brown says exhaustion is the new status symbol. If we don’t feel overwhelmed we must not be doing something important. Are you buying into that?
I want to tell my crazy busy friend about my sister-in-law who realized that they had had so many people visiting their lake cabin over the past few years that none of their family was actually able to enjoy it. They were always hosting someone else, so she called a moratorium for this one summer. A time out. To that I say “Bravo!” It can be done.
But I also realize how hard it must be to think of disappointing friends who don’t have lake homes and who look forward to visiting every year. Boundaries are not without their downside. They take courage and resolve.
As I’ve been thinking about my friend and my sister-in-law, 5 Questions have come to mind that might be helpful to ask ourselves when we’re “CRAZY Busy”:
1. How does this level of busyness affect the state of my soul? Really. Am I at my best at these rpm’s? How much does my busyness feed my false self – the part of me that needs to be validated by my achievements?
2. Is this just a season (temporary), or is it an on-going pattern of over-extending myself?
3. Why have I said “yes” to each of these commitments? Which have I said “yes” to out of fear or a need to prove something? Examine your commitments one by one.
4. Do I have choices where I may have been making excuses? (Ex.: I have to work on the sr. high school party because I did it when our other child was a sr.)
5. Who are the right people to disappoint?
I’d really love to just sit down and have a conversation with you about this over a DQ Blizzard because I’d like to hear your thoughts too.
What do you think? Is there one person you feel like you need to be willing to disappoint in order to have a healthier rhythm of life?
Need a little more encouragement? You are not a victim. You own your choices. Learn from Bob Goff who tries to quit something every Thursday.
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BRAVO! Love it! I needed wisdom and a little shove from a friend to start saying, “No.”
Hard to say and hard to hear! 🙂
AMEN! Thank you Laura!!! Through middle school, high school, college and well into my career, I over-committed myself. It wasn’t until around the age of 27 where I realized that my priorities weren’t in line, but by then I was so overwhelmed that I was to the point of extreme and chronic anxiety. I was a lost sheep and the Lord had been trying to heard me back. But like many sheep, I kept finding cool new ways to move further away from the father who can give me rest and peace (Mathew 11:28-30). I finally ran out of energy; and at first didn’t understand why. I realized my Shepherd wanted me back, to be restored, He wanted to walk WITH me and to help me. It’s amazing that even when we feel like we are doing things that might be “good” it actually might be distracting from what is righteous and pure. (and like you said Laura, man have I gotten some push back with the words “no, not this time etc” it does get easier though!) I now can recognize when I am not at peace and I start saying “I’m too busy to…” is then I know I am but a wondering sheep who’s lost sight or focus of the real goal. I often need to stop and say “Lord I’m sorry I’m trying to be the shepherd… Thank you for taking that off my shoulders. Allow me to rest in YOU.” Constant struggle, but getting better 😉
I love your honest, encouraging thoughts so much Theresa! Thank you for sharing! I love it that your response to busyness is to call to mind the wooing of your gentle Shepherd who wants to restore you, not the image of a shaming authority figure.