Laura Crosby

3 Suggestions to Have “One Word” Make a Difference

February 4, 2023 /

Yep, I’m a little late to the “One Word” game this year. Maybe you too?

No worries! It’s not like it’s a magic potion that transforms your life!

“The will is transformed by experiences not information.”

Dallas Willard

Choosing One Word over the past 5 or so years has proven to have varied degrees of success in my experience.

First, it might be good to define what I mean by “success”.

I want any practice in my life to lead me to a greater resemblance to Jesus. There are years when I’ve chosen a word and then basically forgotten about it for most of the year.🤷‍♀️ Not successful!

Choosing one word for the year just means you want to pay attention to the ways God might want to use that word to form you. You want it to make a positive difference in your spiritual formation.

This year I’ve chosen two words (Call me a rebel. Whatever.). They are “Adventure” and “With”.

If you have chosen a word for 2023, or if you want to today, here’s what you might consider doing to be intentional:

1. Record your insights throughout the year.

I bought a special One Word journal. I have one section titled, “Adventure”, and one titled “With”.

In these different sections I’m recording verses or quotes I come across that help my understanding of how God is using them in my life. I want to study the impact of adventures with God in the Bible.

2. Set some goals.

As well as being attentive to the adventures the Lord might invite me into, I’ve set a goal of choosing one specific “adventure” a month to do. It might be dramatic or very ordinary, but it’s something new to me. My January “adventure” was doing Whole30. Boring, I know, but I learned a lot about myself!

I have an ongoing list of ideas for this that I keep brainstorming.

For your word there might be a different type of monthly goal.

3. Invest resources.

Also, as much as I know many of my adventures with Jesus will not be dramatic, I’d also like some exciting bigger ones, so I have started a special savings account labeled “Adventures”!

Is there an investment you could make (like purchasing a book or an online course) that would help?

Paying attention (as with all of spiritual formation) may be key! The other day I heard this song that encouraged my “with”! I hope it encourages you, whatever your word is!

You are always with me.

Have you chosen “One Word”? Is there anything you are doing to make it meaningful? Pop your thoughts in the comments!

The Most Important Question to Ask When You’re Discouraged

January 21, 2023 /

Anyone else ever look at others, compare, and come up short in your estimation of yourself?

Like, daily?

Yeah, me too.

The other night just before I went to bed I read a post from one of my favorite instagram accounts. It was beautiful, insightful, and everything I wish I had said. That didn’t bother me. It inspired me.

What triggered me was an enthusiastic comment on the post by another talented person I know. I felt like I was back in Middle School and these women were at the “in” kids table, while I was at the loser table.

They’ve done nothing wrong. These are gifted women affirming one another, but some days it feels like all the cool kids are all saying to each other:

“Oh you’re the best!”

“No YOU’RE the best!”

“No, really YOU’RE the best!”

“Ok, well we’re all the best and isn’t it great to be us?“

And meanwhile, a million beautiful, beloved, unsung, made-in-the-image of God women like you are adding value, and joy, and celebration, and creativity, and love to the world.

Maybe that specific example isn’t yours, but there’s another area of life where you are tempted to compare and feel “less than”. Usually it’s in an area where you’re trying to make a difference – parenting, career, leadership, creativity…

Satan loves to whisper in your ear, “The reason no one is noticing you is because you’re not good enough. Not good enough.”

But God asks us the most important question that we need to answer when we’re feeling discouraged or afraid.

It’s the one He asked Adam in the Garden of Eden (Genesis 3:11).

It’s the one my small group reminds each other of when we’re down on ourselves:

“Who told you that…?”

Who told you that you’re not good enough? God, or someone else who’s not God?

We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.

2 Cor, 10:5

A friend of mine suggests two color journaling. You write how you’re feeling in one color down one side of the page, and write a corresponding truth in a different color down the other side of the page.

It’s a good exercise to help adjust your perspective, but it’s still hard for it to truly make a difference.

It’s hard to move the truth from our head to our heart.

Maybe a second question to ask is: “How much am I filling my mind with the words of others and how much am I filling my mind with God’s Words?”

The words of the Creator of the universe say, “You are beautifully and wonderfully made. You have unique gifts and talents. You are chosen to contribute in a way that no one else can, even if no one other than Me says, ‘You’re the best!'”

This isn’t a formula. It’s not a one and done. We feel what we feel! But maybe this is a start.

What’s the lie Satan whispers to you most often? What’s the truth God would speak over you?

You are beloved and He rejoices over you with singing!

What’s the area where you’re most prone to compare and be discouraged?

One More Step to Lightening Your Load in 2023

December 31, 2022 /

The other day I was searching for an old email with medical information John had requested when I came across a different one, saved in my “personal” email file.

I opened it, re-reading the exact words, re-experiencing the pain, and the feeling of self-righteousness in a relationship gone bad.

A couple of days later, some thoughts from Gail MacDonald about “removing what hinders” convicted me – you know…lightening your backpack of the resentment that you may be carrying around.

Let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. 

Hebrews 12:1

Yeah, I have forgiven the person in the email many times. Over and over when they come to mind I have said, “Lord have mercy. Bless them. Heal them. Soften their heart. Give them wisdom.”

So why have I held onto this email – the evidence of this wounding?

Do I want to relish a sense of victimhood? Feel holier than thou? Why is it important to remember the details, rehearse my arguments?

I latched onto that email like a lawyer might clutch a piece of key evidence. Perhaps I may need it later in the high court of heaven in case Jesus forgot exactly what happened, right? 🤷‍♀️.

Love…keeps no record of wrongs

1 Corinthians 13:5

Yes, I’ve forgiven with words over and over again, but if I can’t delete this email, I won’t truly be free of the boulder of resentment I may not be aware I’m carrying around because it’s been in my backpack for so long.

So I hit “DELETE”.

God does not treat us as our sins deserve
    or repay us according to our iniquities.
For as high as the heavens are above the earth,
    so great is his love for those who fear him;
as far as the east is from the west,
    so far has he removed our transgressions from us.

Psalm 103:10-12

Is there something you’re hoarding as evidence of your pain? Is there an added step that you need to take to be free of what may be hindering you from truly forgiving someone?

Planning For a Meaningful (or at least sane) Christmas, part 3

December 3, 2022 /

I’ve been thinking…If I was going to do a series of posts like this, I probably should have sent them a month ago. That was the plan, but stuff happens. So, my word for you today is “Let it go!”

I totally understand if you’re already too busy to read these or try to put them to use. Just delete and move on!

But today there are a few gift ideas, so you may want to take a peek at them. Also, this is the last time I’ll show up in your email till after Christmas, but I’ll be posting what I hope will be uplifting and helpful posts over on Instagram, so join me there!

Day 3 – Prepare

  • Are there traditional Christmas baked goods that you make every year? Make a comprehensive grocery list and stock up now. Or order on Amazon!
  • If Pinterest is your thing and creating is life-giving for you, now is the time to scroll through your “Christmas” file and choose one new craft, recipe, or party you’d like to try. Here’s one I want to try from Boxwood Avenue
  • Look at the days you know will be crazy and write in “pizza” now. (And if you want a fantastic gift idea to send to your grown kids and grands to take some stress off, order here! ) Look at the days when you will be hosting and make out tentative menus now (it will make you feel better to have something down on paper!)

Hostess (and other) Gift ideas:

  • Appetizer on a keep-it platter 
  • Homemade Granola in decorated mason jar
  • Christmas towel wrapped around a bottle of wine
  • Energy bites for hiking (recipe below) (Add this amazing book and give it to the hiker in your family!)
  • Fancy lighter with candle (these are our favs)
  • Paper-white bulbs (This is also a lovely gift for the person in your life who needs a picture of hope – something ugly that becomes beautiful. Add Kate Bowler’s book, Good Enough for a meaningful present)
  • Quick bread or baked goodie for the morning after breakfast. (buy cheap mini ceramic loaf pans at Michaels or Hobby Lobby)
  • A book for the family to enjoy. If you haven’t read The Best Christmas Pageant Ever, add it to your holiday traditions!

If you’re staying several days:

  • Festive holiday paper plates, napkins and printed cups – all of which can be put to use while you’re visiting so there are fewer dishes to wash.
  • Something from your hometown – like wild rice and a recipe from MN or toffee from a local candy shop.

And if you’re all done with your shopping and prepping, a Christmassy book I found delightful is here.

Energy bites

INGREDIENTS

Yields: 16-18 balls

2/3 cup creamy peanut butter (can use chunky too)

1 cup old-fashioned oats

1½ Tbsp. honey

1/4 cup miniature chocolate chips

1/4 cup flaxseeds 

PREPARATION

Mix all ingredients in a bowl until well-combined.

Cover with plastic wrap and chill in the refrigerator for at least 30 minutes.

Once done chilling, roll into approximately 1 inch balls. (Cover hands in a light layer of butter or oil to facilitate rolling and avoid getting sticky hands.) Wrap in squares of Saran wrap and tie with festive ribbon or string.

Store in the refrigerator until ready to be eaten. Enjoy!

That’s it from me! Please share your best Christmas planning tips and gift ideas in the comments!!!

Planning for a Meaningful Christmas, part 2

December 2, 2022 /

Yesterday I sent the first of 3 posts that I’m hoping with help you flourish with joy instead of collapse with exhaustion this Christmas.

Day 1 was “Provide for Your Soul”.

As someone who lives in a state where we’ve already had a couple of snowfalls, I know there is lots to get done.

How do you separate the “have to’s” from the “get to’s” from the “want to’s” from the “can’t afford’s”?

Day 2 – Plan

  • Get out your calendar and put in just the commitments that are absolutely necessary.
  • Have a conversation with your people (maybe around the dinner table tonight?) about their expectations and hopes. 
  • Ask: What is one thing that you want to make sure happens for YOU? What is one thing that you want to make sure happens for others? (like your kids)
  • Ask yourself: What boundaries do you need to put in place – social, physical, emotional? Are there people in your family (very young or very old) that may be more vulnerable to Covid or have other physical limitations?

 Examples:

  • What do you need to say “no” to NOW? (don’t put it off – it’s not fair to others)

  • What can you delegate?

  • What choices can you offer? If you are trying to divide time between in-laws or other family members, decide on 2 options that will work for your immediate family and communicate those early. This is like dealing with a toddler. 😂You have control over what works for you, but you give your extended family choices.

  • Make healthy pre-choices like
    •  committing to a date after which you won’t shop.
    •  committing to just 3 gifts per child as a reminder of the 3 gifts of the wisemen 
    • putting limits on use of devices and social media
    • committing to getting outside for a walk every day or other healthy habits

That’s it for me today! What would you add? Put your thoughts in the comments!

Planning for a Meaningful Christmas 2022 (instead of a December newsletter)

December 1, 2022 /

Every year I try to do a little better at prepping for the Christmas season so that on January 1st I’m sighing in contentment instead of exhaustion and regret. Can you relate?

A squirrel has already decimated a box of Christmas cookies I left in my “outdoor fridge” so I may not be the most credible guide, but we’re in this together, so let me offer a little help and you can reciprocate by sharing your ideas in the comments!

Which one describes  your state of mind? Check one:

  • DENIAL. You’re in denial. You don’t want to be reminded, but the holidays are slowly tiptoeing towards us. There’s a feeling of panic when you look at the calendar. You’ll probably end up blitzing at the last possible second.
  • DEPRESSED. You love Advent, but the circumstances of your life mean you may have to adjust your expectations this year and that’s depressing.
  • DELIGHTED. You have been scrolling Christmas Pinterest ideas since August and you’re  SO EXCITED, but not everyone is onboard with your vision for the holidays! 
  • DEFAULT. You are the default or designated host for ALLOFTHETHINGS, either because you have the most room, or because of your location or whatever, but you struggle not to feel resentful and like you can’t enjoy the holidays because you’re doing all the work.
  • DISCOURAGED. The holidays are great, and you’d like to create some great memories, but you just feel inadequate to host anything. You get sucked into comparing yourself with others on social media and feeling “less than”.

Regardless of how you’re feeling, we can all use some help at the holidays! No one accidentally drifted into a meaningful Advent. It takes some forethought.

So today and for the next couple of days, I’ll give you some suggestions. Before we can give to others, we need to tend to our own soul.

Day One

Provide for your Soul

Be still and know that I am God.

Psalm 46:10

Note to self: It doesn’t say “be busy”, or “be productive” or “be perfect”.

Put away your phone and any other potential distractions. 

  • Take some time today before things get crazy to pray for Advent. Talk to God about what is on your heart. 

  • What are you concerned or anxious about? 

  • In what relationships will you need extra grace and patience? 

  • Are there special services at church you want to be sure to attend?

Sit and breathe in God’s sufficiency for all that is ahead of you.

Don’t panic. I’m with you.
    There’s no need to fear for I’m your God.
I’ll give you strength. I’ll help you.
    I’ll hold you steady, keep a firm grip on you.

Isaiah 41:10

You will keep in perfect peace
    those whose minds are steadfast,
    because they trust in you.

Isaiah 26:3

God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.”

Hebrews 13:5

But now, this is what the Lord says— he who created you, Jacob, he who formed you, Israel: “Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine. When you pass through the waters,
    I will be with you..

Isaiah 43:1

For to us a child is born,
    to us a son is given,
    and the government will be on his shoulders.
And he will be called
    Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God,
    Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.

Isaiah 9:6

The Only Thing You Need to Put on Your Holiday To-Do List

November 27, 2022 /

I really wish I liked Yoga more. It’s healthy.  And it’s so in.  But I’m not crazy about it.

Here are the only things I like about Yoga:

  • the comfy pants that are like legal pajamas,
  • the fact that you do it in a group, and not, for example on a stationary bike in your basement (like a crazy introvert),
  • the corpse pose (where you lay still with soft music playing and the instructor sometimes massages your shoulders).

And one more thing…

They remind you to breathe.  In fact, I think that’s the only part I consistently get right when I go.  I mess up all the poses.  And I can’t make myself pretzelize (is that a word?) like my friend Brooke.

But then they say, “Don’t forget to breathe.” and I think “Yes!  I’ve got that down!  Score!” (Can you tell I’m better at competitive sports than contemplative ones?)

Sometimes the best I can do at Yoga is to just keep breathing.  Sometimes the best I can do in the Christmas season is just keep breathing too.

Our to-to lists are too long.  We drop balls and forget to follow through with details.  And our regular spiritual practices and rhythm of time with Jesus may suffer.  But no matter what happens in the next few weeks, most (hopefully all) of us will still be breathing when we get to the New Year.  So what if breathing became a spiritual practice?  

It’s one many of you are probably familiar with: breath prayer.

Think for a minute…What is a name for God that is especially meaningful to you this season?  Abba Father, Gentle Shepherd, Wonderful Counselor, Prince of Peace, Emmanuel, Light of the World, King of Kings…

As you breathe in, silently say this name for God.

Then… What sums up your need or desire of your heart this season?

Peace?  Healing? Guidance?

Construct a short phrase that expresses this.  As you breathe out, pray this phrase.

For a long time, I’ve felt out of control in many areas of my life, so my breath prayer has been, “Abba Father” (as I breathe in).  “Do what only You can do.” (as I breathe out).

Or maybe you might pray something like Mary did “Holy One, be magnified in my life.”  (Luke 2:46-55).

Or, “Prince of Peace, calm my anxious heart.”

In heavy traffic.  Breathe.  In crowded stores.  Breathe.  In tense family situations.  Breathe.  Sitting in front of your Christmas tree. Breathe.  On a walk alone.  Breathe.

Breathe in.  Breathe out.

Just.  Keep.  Breathing.

A Story of Thanksgiving and When the Holy Spirit Did a Happy Dance

November 19, 2022 /

A year ago, just before Easter, I had gathered a bunch of young moms from our church in California. I wanted to encourage them and asked them to share “Yay God” stories from the past year.

We talked about the blessing of technology during Covid to keep isolated moms with littles connected as they tried to persevere and follow Jesus during a difficult time.

One of the special stories that came up was about a mom named Brooke, married with 3 little kids, who had moved to Switzerland with her husband at the beginning of Covid. She hadn’t found fellowship and Zooming with our group in the states was her lifeline.

Since we lived and ministered in Switzerland for a short while, I asked the group where Brooke had moved.

“Oh, it’s a really tiny town in the Alps”, they responded.

I asked, “Which one? Would you recognize the name?”

I held my breath. “Is it Wengen?”

“YES!” they exclaimed in chorus. “How did you know??!”

I can’t be sure, this is what happened, but I pictured God just laughing with delight as His Holy Spirit danced around my patio where we were gathered.

Because I have a close friend, Jane, who just “happens” to live in Wengen with her husband, and they not only are Jesus followers, they also have the gift of hospitality out the wazoo.

We keep in touch through WhatsApp and I quickly texted her Brooke’s name and information. A few days later my heart soared when Jane sent pictures of Brooke’s family in Jane’s chalet half way around the world, decorating Easter eggs.

This week I got another text from Jane who has invited Brooke and her family to Thanksgiving dinner. I’m looking forward to getting a picture!

Has this solved all of Brook’s family needs for a faith community? No! But I pray that this mama I’ve never met feels seen and I’m grateful for my friend Jane, who welcomes holy interruptions like this.

May Brooke be able to say like Hagar:

“You’re the God who sees me!
“Yes! He saw me; and then I saw him!”

Genesis 16:13 msg

When you feel isolated or discouraged, remember you serve a God who sees you and cares about everything that concerns you.

And if you sense a little nudge from the Holy Spirit, act on it! You may be part of God’s loving reach around the world.

Edward* and Jesus

November 12, 2022 /

A grande skim mocha, extra hot, no whip, is one of my love languages and a luxury I indulge in every morning instead of breakfast. I know, I know. Let me live.

Some mornings very early I bike with my coffee to a beautiful spot nearby, but when my extroverted self needs the hum and hubbub of other humans around, I stay for a couple hours at Starbucks – spend time with Jesus and writing or prepping to speak.

There is a socially awkward man, Edward*, who is also there very early every morning. He looks like he should be a clerk at a rare bookshop in London, but his actual job is working at a grocery store nearby here in Minneapolis. I’m guessing he’s on the Autism spectrum. He’s single, bald, with glasses, and always alone. Sometimes he brings a paper bag with a boiled egg from home for his breakfast. He just sits, staring out the window, but his face lights up when I come in.

He seems lonely so I try to be friendly for a reasonable amount of time (60 seconds?). Remember that time I posted on Instagram about seeing something and saying something?

I say “Hi” and comment on the weather and ask him if he’s working today and if he prefers his newspaper to online. Then I make a point of putting my earbuds in and moving on with my day. He returns to staring out the window.

Here’s the thing. On the days Edward doesn’t work, I wonder if I’m the only person who speaks to him. This morning as I put my earbuds in, the Holy Spirit whispered, “As you did it to the least of these, you did it to Me.”

I think about Jesus and Edward. Would Jesus spend unlimited time talking to him? How much time is enough to love Edward well? I mean Jesus had other people to meet and heal too, right? Which of the things on my “to do list” would Jesus think was more important than talking to Edward?

We can’t love people in a hurry.

I thought of Jesus’ encounter with the Samaritan woman at the well in John 4 – another person, who although she had several husbands, seemed to be isolated, outcast and lonely. Or Matthew the tax collector, or Zacchaeus. Jesus was a first class noticer and an inviter.

Jesus’ life was full of holy interruptions He made time for.

I heard someone say we need to “Walk through life at the speed of love.”

Even when I was super stressed with a long to-do list and two active toddlers to care for, my mentor said, “If you’re too busy to take a pot of soup to someone, you’re too busy.”

Or maybe today she’d say “If you’re too busy to talk to Edward, you’re too busy.”

Yes, I know there are seasons when you’re caring for too many others, or your health is compromised in some way, or your husband is MIA and you’re the one in need of soup. Be gentle with yourself and accept the help or the companionship of Jesus who shows up in the guise of a stranger at Starbucks or a pot of soup on your doorstep.

But if you can, take time for holy interruptions like Edward.

*Not his real name.

Something I’m Struggling With…Maybe You Too?

November 5, 2022 /

I have a lot of questions for God about prayer.

Probably because we don’t always agree on things. I can get confused when I pray and try to trade places with Him, because I really like running the show myself.

God’s plans are perfect, but they’re not easy. They are for our formation and His glory, but I want them to be for my comfort and convenience. Why can’t He just get with the Laura plan?

We have gratification goals. God has galaxy goals.

We see now. God sees eternity.

There’s a verse I’ve been thinking about a lot lately.

The mother of James and John asked Jesus if her sons might be able to sit at His right and left side in His kingdom. I picture it kind of like me running into Bill Gates in the grocery store (although I’m sure Bill doesn’t do his own shopping) and asking him to make my daughters CEO’s of two of his companies.

Jesus’ response?

“You don’t know what you are asking,” Jesus said to them.

Matthew 20:22

I’m guessing Jesus wants to say that to me a lot.

In another place, Jesus rebukes Peter who’s arguing with him about the cross.

“You are seeing things merely from a human point of view, not from God’s.”

mark 8:33

I can imagine Jesus saying that to me too!

The most helpful picture I have of how prayer works is that of me in a small boat on a lake. The boat is tethered by a long rope to a huge redwood tree on the shore. My job isn’t to pull the redwood to me, but to pull me in my boat to the redwood.

The goal of prayer isn’t to make God adjust to my will, but to humbly align myself with His will.

“Faith means trusting that if I knew what God knows and loved like God loves, I’d do what God does.“

john ortberg

I marvel at people who are so sure of God’s will that they pray boldly, like a boss. I’m not that confident, which is good motivation to get to know Him better.

A friend of mine shares the story of two little girls who were playing by a pond. Denise fell in and Maria managed to grab her friend’s long hair and hold her head above the water until help came.

The press picked up the story and interviewed the hero, Maria, asking how the event had changed her life. She answered: “Denise won’t play with me anymore; she says I pulled her hair!”

                                       Yank Get Off GIF

 

Sometimes it feels like God is pulling our hair when He’s saving our lives.

Lord, You know what we don’t know. You see what we don’t see. You are good. Help us to pray according to Your will, and trust you even when we don’t understand.

What are your thoughts on prayer?

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